#weneedastriker #stillaproblem #batcountry #ITK

So yeah I'll give exactly 0 e-cookies to people who can guess what this is about. Since Berbatov left the Lane for Man United's bench has been devoid of a top drawer striker capable of firing us both consistently into the Champions League places and into serious contention for the title. Over the seasons since his passing we've been linked with some serious talent in the #9 position including scorer of THAT goal to win the title last year Sergio Aguero, pre-injury Giuseppe Rossi, Fernando Llorente, Hulk and of course the one we all want but doesn't know we even exist, Leandro Damiao. There was even a brief completely unrealistic but amazing rosterbation inspiring link to Falcao when AVB was hired, solely due to the fact that we have AVB.

Instead over the past couple of seasons we've had: Robbie Keane, Roman Pavlyuchenko, Peter Crouch, Jermain Defoe and Emmanuel Adebayor. I'll spare Harry Kane and Cameron Lancaster from this little rant as they are youth players and not established first teamers. I'll also exclude Gio because…well he's Gio and never played.

Keane was never the same since his return to Tottenham for a second spell. Pav, while scoring some nice goals was never the real complete striker we needed and had a love-hate relationship with Row Z i.e. he loved shooting balls up there, we hated him for it. Crouchy did well for us but again, was never really the right striker. Kudos to the big man for scoring the goals to send us into the CL and then into its quarter finals but I still want to kick him in the crown jewels for getting sent off at the Bernabeu. Defoe and Adebayor are the two we have left - Dempsey doesn't count and Rafa didn't count as a forward for this article - and they've both shown in spells to be close to the ability we need but still lack the menace of a Van Persie, of an Aguero, of a Benzema, of a Gomez even or a Lewandoski.

Defoe's on target to be our 5th highest goalscorer by the end of this season and has been instrumental this season surprising everyone with his ability to lead the line by himself and was crucial in our 2009-10 CL qualifying campaign. If not for a dreadful 2010-11 from all four of the strikers on the books we likely would have made CL again for last season. Regardless, Defoe is our best option up front right now and I believe Adebayor is being played with him to appease our African mercenary who is being paid a whole lot to do very little. Adebayor was excellent last season on loan from Man City and I wish he'd carried over his performances into this year. Defoe's the classic poacher but has expanded his game this season while Adebayor was the more all round, hold-up type striker last season and has regressed this season with only three goals so far this campaign.

So as for all the potential targets we could potentially acquire…I really can't put my finger on which we are actually more likely to sign. Here's my top 5.

Fernando Llorente, who is my personally preferred option seems to be off to Juventus however there could be signs of a breakdown in that move ( but I'll take anything). He's powerful in the air, knows how to break down Man United, can score with both feet and that hair would be a majestic addition to the Tottenham stable of amazing hair. He's in his prime at 27 and, in the main appeal to those of us named Daniel Levy, is available on the cheap due to his contract expiring at the end of the season.

Our old target Giuseppe Rossi has had two major injury layoffs and doesn't interest me at all anymore but he has agreed a move to Fiorentina last I heard. This has led to increased speculation that Stefan Jovetic could be on his way out. Although we haven't been expressly linked to Jovetic, he has the same attributes as Llorente but is younger and would still contribute some crazy crazy hair. Plus he's been playing this year which is always a good thing.

Alvaro Negredo has been in decent form for Sevilla this season scoring 8 goals and he's probably the guy on this list I'm the least excited about. He's never exactly set the world on fire which is the kind of striker we really need to be going for at this point. A Spain international without ever having been a contender to be THE guy for Spain. He's very much like the strikers we already have. Decent, can find the net but lacks that ability to really change a game.

Target number four is kinda all the CFC favourites rolled into one. Aubameyang isn't coming, he said so himself. Siem de Jong would be a nice pickup but he's said he wants to go to the Bundesliga to be with his brother. Remy's gone to QPR, Ba's gone to Chelsea. All the other no-name strikers like Altidore, the Korean guy from Hamburg etc aren't good enough for Tottenham. Plain and simple.

So here it is. THE striker. Leandro Damiao. The guy we've been chasing for ages and we think we're close to and then the window closes and we're sad again. Leandro showed at the Olympics he's something special. He can head the ball well, he can score off both feet and he's still got Brazilian flair. Plus he shares a heart celebration with Bale. More importantly, he's the starting number 9 for Brazil. This is window and probably the summer are probably our last chances to pick him up for anything less than 30 million. I'm gonna throw that right out there. Anything later than that and someone else will go for him with 30 million and Inter will send him off gift-wrapped and everything.

Get better Sandro, use that massive cast to smack some pounds out of Levy's wallet for a striker.

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