Pre-Chelsea Match Karma Thread

Jamie Sabau

Purge all your bad karma here. If it works, it's not weird! FUCHT!

Tomorrow afternoon, Tottenham Hotspur plays perhaps its biggest game of the season as they head to Stamford Bridge to take on Chelsea Football Club in a match that may decide Spurs' Championship League hopes. Win, and Spurs take a big step towards playing at the highest levels of European competition, and all the sweet, sweet cash that goes along with it. Lose and those hopes all but disappear. It goes without saying, but it's a massive, massive game.

But let's be honest. The odds do not look good for us in this match. Chelsea has emerged from the immediate post-Rafa doldrums and is playing some excellent football right now. They're also playing at home, a place where Tottenham hasn't won since the early 1990s. All the football pundits are going to say that Tottenham has no shot. And frankly, who am I to say that they're wrong? Our recent games have been dire, and points have only been gained due to some individual moments of brilliance from Gareth Bale.

Clearly, something needs to be done. Clearly, drinking copious amounts of Red Stag won't help.

So we're going to do another karma thread. We've done this twice before, usually before transfer deadline day, when we so desperately wanted that key signing to propel us to the heights of delirium. Here's how it works:

Purge yourself of your bad karma in this thread. Post your deepest, darkest secrets here, your embarrassing stories, your personal anecdotes that you've never shared, even with your spouse/best friend/significant other.

Post about that time you hit "reply all" and accidentally called your boss a juice tag in a company-wide e-mail. Tell that story about how you distributed a poster across campus for a "Senior Theater Rectal." Post about that time you accidentally banned yourself and the site manager called you "really dumb. For real." ...Oh, wait, that was me.

Last time we did this, the thread was a huge success but ultimately degenerated into a series of "OMG THIS ONE TIME I WAS SOOOO DRUNK" stories You can do better than that. C'mon. Post those embarrassing anecdotes, stories, and TROO FUCHTS. You've got 17 hours to generate enough positive sports karma to propel Spurs to victory.

Audere est facere! Onwards and upwards! Let your personal and (semi) public mortification propel our team to heights unknown! For science! †

† The staff and writers at Cartilage Free Captain are not responsible for any tangible consequences from anything posted in this thread, nor are we culpable if anything posted here results in outright mockery or the creation of a recurring meme. On your own head be it!

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