This is obvious, stars for the original 5 most popular Super Mario Bros games.
5 Stars - Super Mario 64
This was far and away the best game, it revolutionized video games by being the first in 3D and came with the system. Before the internet, there was nothing more satisfying than figuring out the puzzle stars. The wide variety of boards from snow to water to sky to desert was amazing. Just writing this post is making me consider buying a N64 off of amazon. So good that it's actually the 2nd best selling game for the Wii virtual console.
Kyle Naughton - Played good defense and it's not his fault that his 2 amazing "Modric assists" didn't count.
Brad Friedel - His inability to come out of the box was actually a plus yesterday. Funny how that works out.
4 Stars - Super Mario Bros 3
You could choose your own path and they added cool things like the raccoon tail that allowed you to fly or the frog suit that allowed you to swim. The whistles allowing you to warp whenever you wanted were also another great touch as well as the Toad houses where you could get special power-ups.
Roberto Soldado - Played a very good game, then he missed a sitter. At least he was better than most.
3 Stars - Mario Bros
The original that launched it all, so I can't put it any lower than here. But it was kind of hard and you couldn't save and once you found out about the warps you could skip 80% of the game. Pretty good, but not great. Duck Hunt is not included as part of Mario Bros in this review.
Cristian Eriksen - Played a lively half hour, but nothing special.
Danny Rose - He gets 3 stars just for the awesome play on the disallowed Eriksen goal.
2 Stars - Super Mario World
Earns credit for being the first Mario where you could save your game, but was oddly obsessed with Yoshi. It really wasn't a bad game, but something has to be 2 stars. Sorry.
Capotalebinho - Average to poor, seemed like he didn't want to be there.
Michael Dawson - Flailed around like a fish out of water.
Jan Vertonghen - Combined with Dawson and Rose to give a dumb penalty and looked to just be going through the motions.
Nacer Chadli - Anonymous
Andros Townsend - Anonymous unless shooting from the center circle.
1 Star - Super Mario Bros 2
What the fuck was this game? Pulling up vegetables from the ground? Gliding through the air? The only good part was being able to play as different characters. Obvious choice for 1 star.
Unused Subs - For god's sake Sherwood, there's a reason you are allowed 3 subs, please use them.
Harry Kane - Unranked