Friday Morning Hoddle Of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News And Links For May 2, 2014

Clive Brunskill

Tottenham Hotspur news and links with a zesty British twist.

Happy Friday, Spursland! Your old buddy theroosevelts was tied up yesterday night, so once again I'm stepping in to deliver a Hoddle in my own inimitable inoffensive sufficient style. Below is your theme of the day, and below that is the headlines, God I wish they weren't.

Thee Oh Sees: Toe Cutter - Thumb Buster (via MrSmoDato)

And now the "news"

De Boer: I was honest when talking about Spurs job- Sports Mole

De Boer says he has been approached by Tottenham. Tottenham say they haven't approached de Boer. Tim Sherwood says someone is telling porky pies. I know what I believe, and that is that I am now desperately hungry for a pork pie.

Gunners and Spurs to battle it out for Joel Veltman- Mirror

Once we sign up the brilliant young genius of a new manager who is definitely going to sort the mess we're in out, win the League and CL double, and cure the common cold by the end of next year, these transfer battles are going to start to look like this.

Spurs game could be the end of the line for Sam Allardyce at West Ham- Telegraph

You'll have a hard time shifting him out of the hotseat etc. etc. etc. etc. ad nauseam ad infinitum

NUFC fans to walk out of St James' Park on the 69th minute- 101GreatGoals

I can't see any conceivable way to mine some puerile humour out of this, so I'm going to move on.

Scholl: Man United players will find Van Gaal 'difficult'- Guardian

That's a load of bollocks. Big, hairy bollocks, exposed to a dressing room full of disgusted footballers.

Hodgson backs Januzaj's Belgium decision- Soccerway

Damn you, you frustratingly lovely old gentleman. I bet you gave him 50p pocket money as you sent him on his way to the continent.

Barry Glendenning said a silly thing about Naples- SBNation

You kinda have to feel bad for Bazza. The one time he tries to make it look like he's done some background reading on something, it comes back to bite him on the ass.

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