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FA Cup, Tottenham Hotspur Vs. Fulham: Match Report, 0-4 Full Time

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Paul just e-mailed me to say he couldn't write the match report for this game. I need to write about a 4-0 loss with a Michael Dawson red card like I need a hole in the head. Now that I think about it, even if he was lying about not being able to do it, I don't blame him. Tottenham Hotspur got straight up thumped by Fulham today. It was embarrassing, and I have like 100 words to go. Ick.

We started the game stupendously by giving away a penalty kick. Alan Hutton fouled Clint Dempsey in the box, because he is below average for a professional footballer and he looks like he came from a trailer park. The irony of this is that Clint Dempsey actually came from a trailer park, and is infinitely more classy than Alan Hutton. Dempsey went and drew another penalty three minutes later, when he got Michael Dawson sent off. In case you didn't know, Danny Murphy scored both penalties.

Brede Hangeland added a third goal on a corner kick, and Moussa Dembele scored a stunner to make it 4-0 at the end of the first half. The two teams then proceeded to dick around for another 45 minutes.

If we don't buy a striker I'm going to light my house on fire.