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UEFA Champions League, Tottenham Hotspur Vs. AC Milan: Who's Freaking Out?

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This guy is. This guy is having an absolute panic attack. As you all know, before this season, Tottenham Hotspur had never qualified for the new and improved European Cup, re-branded as the UEFA Champions League. Last year, if you told me that we would get through the group stage before falling to AC Milan in the Round of 16, I would have taken that and called it a serious success. Of course, like any spoiled brat, I wasn't actually done wishing for stuff once I got what I originally wanted. No, I'm a small and petulant child, as we've discussed. I want more Champions League gimme gimme gimme!

Originally, we just wanted fourth place and a spot in Champions League. That was good enough for us. When we had that, we would be happy. Then, we wanted to get out of the group stages. Now, we want to get by Milan. We're never satisfied, are we?

Or maybe that's just me. Maybe you guys are all super realistic and reasonable and you just want us to do our best. You're already happy with what we've achieved and you won't be heartbroken if we lose to Milan. To you people: I salute you. You are better people than I am.

But for everyone else: Are you freaking out like I am? Because I'm losing my ish. Oh my god, we have to wait another 5 1/2 hours for this game. I don't know what I'm going to do with this time. Probably just drink heavily. Where's the whiskey? Jesus Christ I'm a wreck.