Jermain Defoe Reportedly Not Interested In Newcastle Move

Well boo hoo, Jermain. You couldn't just be nice and let us get £10m for you, could you? No, instead of moving to the northeast where you might DO SOMETHING you'd rather live up your posh lifestyle in London while NOT SCORING GOALS.

Sorry, let's back up a bit. The internets have been abound with rumors that Newcastle United are going to bid £10m for Tottenham Hotspur striker Jermain Defoe. I'm pretty sure that every last member of this site's commentariat would take the money without a second thought and laugh all the way to the bank, but it doesn't matter if he doesn't want to go to Newcastle. Reportedly, he doesn't.

Okay, so I'm probably just crabby and bitter this morning because I haven't had my coffee. This rumor is probably bogus as hell anyway. I doubt Newcastle would actually pay £10m for a 28-year-old striker who doesn't score goals. And honestly, if Defoe doesn't want to move to Tyneside he doesn't have to.

But if this £10m bid is real and Defoe's lack of willingness to move to Newcastle is what stops it...GODDAMN IT JERMAIN.