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Wednesday Morning Hoddle Of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News And Links January 24, 2012

Is that Dan Levy running security for Harry?
Is that Dan Levy running security for Harry?

Happy Humpday Spursland! Big things happening in the news today. We have Harry's trial, and that stadium in the place nobody wants it is back, and, and, and well that's really about it. Maybe tomorrow I'll just make a bunch of stuff up. It's the "Mail Method".

And now the "news"

The Story That Will Not Die Gets New Legs (Yes It's About The Stadium)- Sky Sports

So a team could buy the Olympic Stadium. Well West Ham better get their ass down to the bank and get that credit check in motion before Dan Levy gets all hot and bothered about moving the team again.

Mario Stopmerelli Set To Quit English Football Due To "Persecution"- BBC

I will not comment on Mario Balotelli yet as it would take away from what will probably an atomic rant on the subject coming Thursday to Wheeler Dealer Radio so I will restrain my comments to the conduct of his agent. Dude, what the f@ck are you thinking? Do you think anyone gives a S$%t if this guy up and leaves England? No! Nobody does! Even his own club wouldn't really miss him. You think those crotchety old men in the FA will care? All you are doing by commenting on this at all is making it worse. Tell your client not to say anything right now. You, yourself, don't say anything public right now. You are only making the guy seem more toxic to potential transfer suitors if he really does want to leave England. Did you think for a second that a bench player (admittedly a very good one) had enough pull to get an entire league to blow sunshine up his ass just because you did your little woe is me spiel in the press? Dear Mario Balotelli, here is some free advice, get a better agent because the one you have now is worthless. And yes, I am still going to scream at you on a podcast that approximately 14 people listen to each week and Billy Cundiff is still an asshole.

Harry Threatens To Sue, Or Something Like That. This Trial Is Confusing- Sky Sports

I'd like to tell you what is going on in Harry's trial, but I can't because there are so many expletives edited out and for some reason I can't figure to what they are and I also have no idea what a bung is. I mean, I thought I knew what a bung was, but I think these tricky, tricky Brits have another definition for it.

What's happening around SB Nation after the jump

Harry Redknapp, An Artists Rendition- SB Nation Soccer

Apparently not a good artist's rendition. I am not entirely sure that the artist was drawing the same person the whole time. Like the head is pretty Redknapp-esque, but the neck is about as far away from Harry's neck as you can get that is seems clear that he accidentally started drawing the guy next to him.

Carlos Tevez Has Not Lost 10 Million Pounds In His Hold Out- SB Nation Soccer

What is it up at Man City? Is there something in the water that makes strikers have ginormous hissy fits?

Mario Goetze Out With Stress Fractured Pubic Bone- SB Nation Soccer

I wonder how he got that injury? lolz