Happy Thanksgiving, Spursland! Now if the very first pilgrims were here they would probably be burn us at the stake. After all, we have a thanksgiving every year and not for any particular reason. Their Thanksgivings were pretty rare and usually to commemorate some sort of victory, like this or because a protestant army took another city during the Thirty Years War. But Thanksgiving has evolved like just about everything brought to these shores be people from another land into something distinctly American. Today we gather with family, friends, and people who read the same soccer team themed website and say thank you to whatever greater being we believe in or just to each other.
Someone, who really cares who, suggested a "what we are thankful for" Hoddle of Coffee for today. The following is at least my list of things that I am both thankful for and that you might have some connection to. Feel free to leave what you are thankful for in the comments section. I'll be around in the comments section and on Twitter just steaming ass drunk from 10 am or so on. So if your family is too much just come on over, some of us will be around.
1. For Ryan And Bryan for tolerating me and being so understanding of all my needs and eccentricities. (Editor's note: We only do this because Kevin requires it of us, and threatens us with lashings if we don't)
2. For Kevin, who chose me over someone who almost certainly would have been a better choice to write this every day. (Editor's note: One of those people is my dog)
3. For the Commentariat, who over time have become a surrogate family and who (some) have grown to like what I produce (Editor's note: Guys, you are outstanding actors. He bought it!)
4. For Nick, who took over for me so I could do something very important to me, despite the fact that he is a dick who...ah screw it. I was going to be an a-hole to him right here, but it's Thanksgiving so Nick, just thanks man. (Editor's note: He didn't even realize that Nick stole his thunder and will have his job in a week)
5. I am thankful for family, my girlfriend, and for bourbon. (Editor's note: Mmmmm, bourbon)
(Editor's note: And we are thankful for theroosevelts, for some reason)
God bless folks
And now the "news"
I look forward to watching this game stinking drunk while ignoring my distant family members and mostly just hoping for cut always of Gazza doing eccentric things. I am beyond caring about the Europa League on any level other than that Spurs are playing and whenever they play I'd like to see them win. Also, I will be too drunk to care. My old man went out and bought a handle of Gentlemen Jack. Happy holidays, folks.
"Fears" (read: is sure will happen). Hey, fascist racist douche bags whose mothers clearly didn't hug them enough, we won the war, now pipe down. The world, as an interconnected society, has deemed your ideas to be false and moronic and your tattoos ensure that no women or man will ever look at you as a sexual option. So maybe screaming things that piss the rest of us off at a football match is all you have left in the world, we don't care. Pipe down.
Yeah, that's what I am calling AVB now, The Dashing One. Just look at him and tell me he isn't a modern day, European, Han Solo. And if you have a problem with that, well I have an alley you can meet me in, it's called the comments section.
From all the accounts I have read about players interactions with the owners of the last league, not many of them painted a positive picture of the owners. I am not talking about "the boss was a dick" stories. I am talking "OMG I think that guy might be a literal idiot, who did he/she make their money to own this team?" I hope this new league can do a better job and will have better owners, however the Seattle franchises rumored name "Seattle Sirens FC" might not be a positive sign.
Truer words have never been spoken. Sure, it may matter to the fans of the club, but that is of little importance to the reason why this club has had almost unprecedented success in the last seven years and also had seven managers in that time period. The team's owner is just another bored oligarch who likes to play with his toys in a desperate attempt to experience anything in life now that he basically owns everything. He treats Chelsea like the still bored and boring, but less uber wealthy heiresses and heirs of great fortunes play with speedboats or race cars. If he crashes it ,well, at least that was something different in their perfect yet fucking boring lives. And it isn't as if there are real consequences for them so screw it.
Submitted without comment because to do so would serve only to somehow split us as a community on a day of coming together this Thanksgiving. And I am very thankful that a ceasefire was signed. May it last much longer than originally planned.
"How bad are they," you ask? So bad that I think DC United will average a higher per game attendance than them this season. No, like for real. (Editor's note: Tickets can be had on StubHub for $1.40 -- seriously -- and new D.C. resident Kevin McCauley has not been yet. He hates America, fun, puppies and probably Thanksgiving, but not mashed potatoes and gravy. Nobody hates mashed potatoes and gravy.)
I have said it a few times here before, but for all you youngsters out there (and there are a few) if you are thinking about playing sports in college (it doesn't matter what sport of what level so long as you are trying to be competitive) -- expect things like this to happen to you, a lot. If you have further questions, feel free to ask me. I have plenty of stories to tell.