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What Could You Spend Your Mega Millions Winnings On?

Think of all the hair gel. (Photo by Julian Finney/Getty Images)
Think of all the hair gel. (Photo by Julian Finney/Getty Images)
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For those of you outside the country, or in one of the sad few states without Mega Millions, you may be unaware that the current jackpot for that lottery, being drawn tonight, is 540 million dollars. After your cash option and taxes you will come out with about 300 million dollars. Converted to the British Pound, that comes out to 187.3 million. So I began to think of all the awesome things you could buy for Spurs with that amount of money. Here is the, by far, non-exhaustive list of what to put in the memo box of your check to Daniel Levy.

  1. Fund half the cost for the Northumberland Development Project (Estimated at 400 million pounds)
  2. One Lionel Messi transfer
  3. Six Eden Hazard transfers (At 30 million pounds each)
  4. One Thousand, Eight Hundred and Seventy Mido's (At 100,000 pounds each)
  5. 18.7 Million Pounds of Styling Gel for Scott Parker
  6. 9.3 Million Eyebrow Clippings for Aaron Lennon
  7. 62.3 Million McNugget Happy Meals for Scott Parker
  8. 1.87 Million Nike Shox for Harry Redknapp to ****ing run around in
  9. An American hosted World Cup in 2026, 2030, 2034...
  10. 37,400 Hours, or 1,558 Days, or 4 years and change with a 5,000 pound an hour prostitute for Louis Saha
  11. A 30 Square Mile dog run for Kyle Walker to tire himself out in
  12. The country of Zimbabwe, turning it into one gigantic training facility
  13. A top secret cloning facility in Croatia under Dinamo Zagreb's stadium, where you will hone and develop a Luka Modric for every position
  14. Anfield Stadium, with enough left over to blow it up
  15. Enough Stem Cells to regrow the cartilage in Ledley's knee AND make him play like a 21 year old again!
  16. Not Leandro, because when Internacional found out you won the lottery they then jacked the price up to 200 million pounds
  17. David Beckham's right foot to replace Gareth Bale's right foot
  18. A lifetime supply of Metamucil for Brad Friedel
  19. Reading lessons for Harry Redknapp
  20. Nothing for Spurs, ALL THE COCAINE for yourself.

Those are only a few suggestions, I'm sure you all have even more to give in the comments.