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Bolton Wanderers Vs. Tottenham Hotspur, 2012 Premier League: Match Report, BRB SINGING ABOUT MY FEELINGS

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Tottenham Hotspur looked like they didn't know where the net was for about 35 minutes, then scored a screamer, then started derping, then continued derping, then magically turned on some awesome. This game was really weird. I feel bad for Bolton Wanderers, who I like a lot, because I think they're probably going to get relegated. Tottenham won 4-1, and they're in fourth place, one point behind Arsenal.

Luka Modric scored the opening goal in the 37th minute with an absolute screamer. It wasn't really a "set piece goal", but it might technically count as a goal scored from a corner. Rafael Van der Vaart delivered the "assist" with a short corner to Modric, who unleashed a sick shot with a nasty swerve into the back of the net from 25 yards.

The first 15 minutes of the second half went about as poorly as they possibly could have. Nigel Reo-Coker, who I thought had no value outside of running and executing tackles, somehow scored a goal in the 51st minute. My brain has already erased any memory of how this happened.

Spurs were poor for the next nine minutes and Bolton looked more likely to take the lead than Tottenham did before an excellent counter attack from Tottenham in the 60th minute. Gareth Bale set it up, passing into the feet of Van der Vaart who placed a shot into the back of the net at the far post with a silky touch. Rafa had been poor in the first 15 minutes of the half, but his finish was spectacular. Unfortunately for Bolton, that counter opened the floodgates.

Tottenham immediately scored a second with a spectacular setup. Luka Modric started the move with a jaw-dropping through ball to Aaron Lennon, who burned the Bolton defense for pace and took the ball to the byline. He then put a hard ball across the box towards the far post, where Emmanuel Adebayor was there to tap it in.

Just seven minutes later, Adebayor completed a brace, running onto a through ball by Bale before he rounded Adam Bogdan and finished calmly into an empty net.

For the tl;dr crowd: Tottenham Hotspur are the best team ever and the last three months totally didn't even happen at all and oh my goooooooooooooooooooooood I love everything about everything ever.

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