From The Department Of 'Do Not Want': Tottenham Reportedly After Marco Borriello

Has anyone watched Serie A lately? If you haven't, you might have the opinion that Marco Borriello wouldn't be an awful stopgap solution for Tottenham Hotspur at the striker position. However, those who have watched Serie A in the last year how know terrible, awful, very bad of an idea this is.

According to our good friends at Metro and Goal.com -- neither of which I consider reputable, but hey, it's a slow day! -- Tottenham Hotspur are chasing Borriello. Roma loaned him out to Juventus with an option to buy last season, and Juventus did not exercise that option because Borriello really stinks.

On the surface, this might not feel so bad. Ability to play alone or with a partner! Italian international! Experienced! Three double-digit goal seasons in Serie A! But it is bad. It is so, so bad.

I don't want to be too harsh on Borriello in case there's any truth to these rumors at all, because if he comes to Tottenham I will support him and cheer for him to score goals, but I really cannot emphasize enough how much I DO NOT WANT. No. No. No. No. Please god no. He's so bad. The absolute worst. Please Lord Jesus protect my team from the horror of Marco Borriello.

NO.