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Happy Monday, Spursand! The Golden Globes were last night and, as per usual, it was the biggest piece of shit America annually produces that still has redeeming qualities. Everybody in that overcrowded ballroom (Attention Beverly Hills Fire Marshall: they somehow crammed the entire cast of Le Mis into 10 square feet. That's 45 people!) wishes that this was either the Emmy's or the Oscar's.
And the clothes. Oh the clothes.
Never has there been a larger collection of beautiful people who look less attractive in the name of trying to be more beautiful and glamorous. This must be America's version of those hats at the royal wedding, only ours happens like six times a year instead of once evert 35. But there are redeeming qualities. Tina Fey and Amy Poehler making fun of a room full of celebrities is one, and the look of sexual desire on Lena Dunham's face when Bill Clinton walked out was the other.
And now the "news"
Harry Denies AVB Rift- Sky Sports
This is an important story because ... wait, it is the opposite of that. Who cares if these guys like each other? They are competitors; it isn't important that they be best buddies and have a secret handshake to demonstrate to all their special bond. Their job is to beat the other guy, or to go for the draw against the other guy. Whichever is applicable to their personal situation friendship is not however, something anyone should care about in regards to them.
Livermore On His Way To Harry?- BBC
Remember when Harry quietly, gracefully and without disturbance left us, and how many Spurs fans were happy he was finally out of our lives? Well, you might also remember that I wasn't in that group. Harry Redknapp writes the jokes for me and being a naturally lazy person, that appeals to me in the same way that a long term relationship with Taylor Swift appeals to nobody (Editor's note: IT APPEALS TO ME). Oh yeah, Jake Livermore will be missed when he eventually departs QPR for a life in the Championship with Jamie O'Hara.
Second Season Swansea- SB Nation Soccer
I am confused by this article. It has lines in italics that aren't the editor making fun of the author's deficiencies.
Ray Lewis Is The Terminator, Peyton Manning Is Mankind- SB Nation
Skpijack and I will be receiving your "BUT HE IS A MURDERER" complaints about our love of Ray Lewis in the comments section, as we are the #KRU. Follow me on twitter if you are confused by what it is to be #Kru. Hint: Bryant A (not to be confused with Ashlock) is very, very not #Kru.
Sergio Ramos Gets Banned For Insulting A Referee- SB Nation Soccer
The extended ban is presumably for being embarrassingly polite about it.