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Happy Thursday, Spursland! By the time you are reading this, you will probably know, Danny Rose is gone. Yes, it is only for a year, and yes we don't really need him but ... I mean he did this! And because he is leaving for this long time, I haz sad.
And now the "news"
Parker Believes Injury Layoff Benefited Him- Sky Sports
If only he had looked at injury layoffs this way back before the Euros when he really could have used it, instead of letting his nagging injury turn into a pretty serious one.
Clint Dempsey, Comfortable At Striker- ESPN
Wel,l it is nice that one of us comfortable with that situation. And when I say "one of us" I don't mean Clint and myself. I mean Clint and myself and everyone else that exists. There are people in rural Madagascar (potential home of America 2.0) that have seen a football like twice who would look at Clint that far up front and go, "you know, I am unsure about this situation".
Eden Hazard Kicks A Ball Boy, Maybe- SB Nation Soccer
Before I say anything about this, I want to remind you that in my day job I work very closely with kids of this age. I routinely am in situations where a kid will do something amazingly disrespectful just to fuck with me and I have to handle that situation with professionalism, keeping mind that it is a moment to teach someone, not "teach that kid a lesson" in that 1950;s sense. Basically I know a bit about dealing with these types of situations.
So okay, that said fuck this kid. What an asshole. These guys are out their trying to perform their jobs in a high stakes situation and he is preventing them from doing that in a position that is supposed to be objective. Keep in mind that if you look at it from other angles it is pretty clear that he didn't even touch the kid who fake fell and then held the ball underneath him and then faked a rib injury. I say faked because even if contact was made Hazard didn't even wind up, and he was selling it like he got a shotgun full of rock salt to the chest.
And we keep calling him a ball boy, but that kid is not a boy anymore. He is much too large physically and, supposedly, mentally mature at his age to be grouped in with children like this. So screw you, man, who is only a child in the most technical of ways, for not getting kicked by a professional athlete and then essentially ruining his good name forever, over nothing. You just ruined it for other ball boys who have actual bad things happen to them while they were just trying to do their job.
So can we all not freak out over Hazard basically and hate Hazard forever for doing nothing really wrong and then having a child lie and claim he did, despite video evidence that the kid is lying.
Aston Villa Are Very Not Good- SB Nation Soccer
After coming down on the side of someone who at first glance has assaulted a child, I figure it was good to go with something less controversial next. Seriously, though, kicking children is very, very wrong. Looking like you kicked a child, but not actually doing it at all is totally fine. BTW Villa really are awful, aren't they? Aston Villa should not be inflicted on to children. No child deserves that.
For a video metaphor of this story, please click here.