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Thursday morning Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for May 23, 2013

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Tottenham news and notes, with rumors!

This is the greatest picture of all time and I can't stop using it
This is the greatest picture of all time and I can't stop using it
Jan Kruger

Happy Thursday, Spursland! So crazy new rumors are swirling, guys and girls. Lets not talk about it directly, though, we might jinx it. I just want to know how you will celebrate if he finally comes. For me, I am going to wait to celebrate until they announce his kit number, and then that is exactly the number of Shiner Ruby Red Bird's I am downing while dancing around my apartment in the nude. Deal with that knowledge.

And now the "news"

Bale Hints At Tottenham Stay- Sky Sports

Except for not really, no, he didn't. This is what it's like, folks. We have an entire summer of stories like this to talk about. STRAP IN, IT'S GOING TO BE WILD!

Spurs To Receive £43 Million Bid For Bale- Transfer Tavern

This is not true, but the people at the Transfer Tavern just really needed to make you feel things inside of you.

An Open Letter To Jose Mourinho- Managing Madrid

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Who Will Go, Who Will Stay- Barca Blaugranes

Gee, I hope they aren't trying to stump us with that question. The answer is WHOEVER YOU WANT, AND WHOEVER YOU DON'T. Except Bale, you can't have him.

All Your Sergio-Tiger Feud Coverage- SB Nation Soccer

I don't actually know what is going on here, I just know it's happening and somebody said fried chicken. Other than that, I'm in the dark. I try to figure out what's going on in the world;s lamest, probably most cordial slap fight, but I fall asleep every time.