Happy Wednesday Spursland! Welcome to mid-week fellas. Which I guess is the day when all the stupid stuff happens. For example 90% of the words below this one.
And now the "news"
Madrid Will Wait On Bale Until New Manager Is Tapped-Sky Sports
Look at Perez back-peddling like a cornerback. I feel confident in saying this now, Bale stays at least another year. Which is bad news for literally everyone in England who isn't us. It is also great news for all London shops that supply the world with terrible clothing.
Liverpool looking Into A Certain Icelandic Midfielder-Give Me Sport
Because that is going to blunt the sting of Suarez leaving.
Value Means Nothing In United's Cesc/Thiago Choice-The Busby Babe
Just sign Cesc and make Piers Morgan cry you big dumb idiots. Feel the hate flow through you, and then watch the talent actually be in the center of the pitch.
Michael Bradley Is The Key For The USMNT-SB Nation Soccer
Hey guys, you want to hear the funniest thing you will ever here? Go and ask Mechanick to compare Bradley to some players of similar abilities, make sure you have the popcorn ready before he starts. Also, this was written before last night's USMNT match and was totally 100% right.
Modric Rules Out Chelsea Move-We Ain't Got No History
Somewhere deep down in my twisted scrap of flesh and emotional damage called a heart I know he did this for us. He refused to go because he still has feelings for us, in secret. And one day he will realize his mistake and come swooping in on a white horse and say it was all a mistake, and there is nobody in the world he loves more than us. And he will buy us the diamond so big people will ask us what he did to us right before that. And he will take us on vacation to India. And all our friends will say how great it is, but secretly hate that he isn't with them. We are perfect for each other, I know it.