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Friday Morning Hoddle Of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News And Links June 28, 2013

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A Tottenham Hotspur target turns down a move to Real Madrid and Messi is finally going to pay his taxes.

Ian Walton

Happy Friday, Spursland! Oh, another week is in the books and maybe it was a rough one for you, maybe someone broke up with you, maybe the boss was on your back at work. Whatever it was, just remember that it's all OK. You are always welcome here, and it could be worse. you could be so financially tarnished you are auctioning off your old. clothes. Someone, anyone just hire this poor women.

And now the "news"

Paulinho Rejects Madrid Rumors-Sky Sports

OHHHHHHHHH, he rejected them!!!! He didn't leave any room for walking that back! It is over. Good guys win, bad guys lose. And none of you out there better say anything lame like "well he doesn't really fit into a 4-3-3 as our team stands. Wake up and smell the napalm baby! This is a win. It belongs in the win column. Now, who has the (insert regional utility beer here)? Cheers.

BREAKING: Highly Rated French Striker Would Like To Go To Newcastle-London 24

The phrase "it seemed to work well for every other guy I know who did it" was definitely said when he was discussing this with his people.

Is There A Place Of Isco At Madrid?-SB Nation Soccer

No. Of course their isn't. There might not even be a spot for Bale.

Messi Reportedly Settles Tax Charges-SB Nation Soccer

15 million euros? For that kind of money it must be something like tax fraud + 3 dead hookers and a sack of MDMA.

Tevez Signs For Juventus-SB Nation Soccer

Look out, Juventus is back and their attack is looking scary. Like the prospect of having to watch a Sandra Bullock comedy.

"Reports" Surfacing That Ronaldo Will Meet With Man U Brass In Coming Days-Managing Madrid

Don't be stupid Cris (that's what me and his other close pals call him). Think of how much you would get from Monaco. Plus, they have crazy low taxes so there is no chance of getting "Messi'd".

NFL Rookie Runs 25 MPH On Treadmill-SB Nation

Stop trying to be Bale.

Aaron Hernandez Denied Bail-SB Nation

"Come on Aaron. You never ever move the body, smh." said someone horrible.