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Wednesday morning Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for June 5, 2013

On Roberto Soldado, bad kits, drugs and our chatroom.

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Jan Kruger

Happy Wednesday Spursland! Oh, the summer months, my friends. Oh, the joy of the sun, great weather, and the ability to drink outside. I've got to tell you that this, combined with the rumors of Madrid buying Bale for 100 million, has me rapidly approaching what we would have to call a sunny disposition. And I won't have it. It feels unnatural. Thank god I can just go read about all the players Manchester United might buy and I go right back into my wheelhouse: aggressive pessimism, with a hint of boyish mischief. And all is right with the world.

And now the "news"

Spurs Ready Soldado Bid-Telegraph

Remember kids,buy all the Valencia players.

Spurs To Make 30 Million Euro Martinez Bid-Give Me Sport

Paging the Dispatches From #batcountry Desk in the Cartilage Free Captain newsroom! We actually have a newsroom now, a chat room. That's how you know you made the big time.

Liverpool Have New Kits, They Suck-SB Nation Soccer.

This looks like some sort of hippie art from the 60s that was conveniently forgotten by history. I've never thought acid was a good thing, after seeing these jerseys it might now be a necessary thing.

Tommy Oar's Chip Should Count Double-SB Nation Soccer

If by chip you mean cross. I feel mislead by that title. Thanks a lot whichever asshole wrot...oh Ryan Rosenblatt, never mind.

King Of The Mountains-SB Nation

Look guys, it's summer (presumably), it's nice out (presumably) where you are. I know you aren't working. So kick back and relax with this amazing long story. is that what these things are called? Maybe a "long lead"? I think I heard something like this called that on Studio 60 once. Whatever just read it, you animal.