Thursday Morning Hoddle Of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News And Links For August 1, 2013

Happy Unhappy Thursday, Spursland!

I was absent yesterday and If I may quote my esteemed colleague Edward F., "What the fucking shit?!" And I happen to agree. I lam a longtime Daniel Levy apologist. I have said many many times that Daniel Levy does not make epic mistakes. He is cautious and squeezes every penny out of the players for the betterment of the club. But even I am wondering how he is going to turn selling Steven Caulker, who was OUR GUY, for such a paltry amount into a smart move.

On top of that, agent fees -- something that nobody has ever been able to explain to me, what they are or why the clubs pay and not the players -- are holding up the Soldado deal and the Romanian dude whose name Brain Mechanick will no doubt butcher is not coming yet.

Daniel Levy might just have lost me. If this doesn't somehow work out. If he doesn't somehow pull the rabbit out of the hat then we are screwed.

Lets just say we are all nervous, and if you aren't then you should be.

And now the "news"

Kaka Would Welcome Bale- Sky Sports

Well it is nice that they found Kaka something to do while he rides the bench down there.

Bale Tells AVB He Wants To Leave- Telegraph

You know the deal, bro: €100 million and that 20-year-old striker tossed in on top. And when I'm in Madrid on holiday you better be free for dinner because we will remain besties or the deal is off. Also, you better not come crawling back here begging for us to take you back...because we totally would and we'd really like to not look so weak.

Team-By-Team Championship Preview- SB Nation Soccer

If you want to know what is up with Ipswich Town. All two of you.

Break Shea Sidelined With Knee Injury- SB Nation Soccer

Is there something going on here? Like how thoroughbred races horses have genetically weakened joints and leg bones now because in the 70's and 80's several horses were overused in breeding? Because it seems like recently all the young Americans have shitty knees.

Eagles WR Riley Cooper Drops N-Bomb At Concert In Ridiculous Threat- SB Nation

It takes a big man to threaten to fight all the black people at a Kenny Chesney concert. What a ridiculous moron.