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Tottenham Hotspur Doomed to Heartbreak Against Norwich

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It's the ones you love that hurt you the most.

YOU WON'T EVEN LOOK AT ME!
YOU WON'T EVEN LOOK AT ME!
Shaun Botterill

Well, the Arsenal result confirmed what we all knew about Tottenham Hotspur Football Club: we are unquestionably screwed and on a fast track out to League 2.

However, as bad as a derby loss was, this week will be even worse. We will not be facing a bunch of homeless nomads we hate and despise. We will be betrayed by someone we loved. On our journey down the table, this cut is the deepest. E tu Chris Hughton?

Norwich's current manager played 398 games for Tottenham and is one of the best fullbacks to pull on the lilywhite shirt. Following some brief stays with West Ham and Brentford, Chris returned to the fold and joined Tottenham's coaching staff. Starting in 1993 Chris helped build Tottenham into one of the preeminent clubs in English football. He served under 10 different managers. Until 2007, when he left us. We just can't explain the pain. Now every time we see him, it's like every break up song you've ever heard. Maybe we should have been a little bit stronger. Maybe we should have been a little bit smarter. Maybe we should have been a little bit rougher. But now he's gone. Left us for those floozies at Newcastle. We had to tell ourselves that coaches are like buses, see one gone see fifteen Iberians coming.

But it was fine. They were profiting from everything we taught, but he was gone and we didn't have to see him anymore, reminding us of our pain. He got burned by his new love and dabbled with Birmingham City. Then in another year or two, he comes back to the Premier League, with a flashy new girlfriend from Norwich, wearing showy yellow and green Italian clothes.

Now he's in the Premier League, playing attractive football in open relationships with exotic players like Ricky Von Wolfswinkel. Taking points off of Spurs in hard fought draws and knocking us out of cup competitions. And the scars of those games remind me of us, they keep us thinking that we almost had it all.

So once again, he returns to White Hart Lane to hurt us. Knowing exactly where to hurt us and take his chances. He's rubbing his fancy new team in our face. And everyone loves them. They're a neutral's favorite and we're just going to have to deal with the entire league telling us how great they look together. And he doesn't even care that our team's locker room still kind of smells like him. It's going to hurt. It's going to suck. We're going to watch him stalking their sidelines as they pull us apart.

And unlike a normal loss, we have to watch him the whole time, knowing that we will never, ever be getting back together.

RIP THFC.

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