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Wednesday Morning Hoddle Of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News And Links For January 22, 2014

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Tottenham Hotspur news and links, with unfounded Tom Carroll skepticism.

Julian Finney

Happy Wednesday, Spursland! Not so long ago we, the elite members of the Cartilage Free Captain writers room, ranked our up-and-coming prospects. Now considering how well the young man from France has been playing for us, I want you to think about this and then do your "excited, but don't want your coworkers to know it" dance as you realize he was only ranked #6 on the list. This Tom Carroll kid must fucking own

And now the "news"

Harry Awaits Word From Spurs On Carroll- Sky Sports

"Daniel used to return my texts much more promptly," a distressed Redknapp was overheard saying.

Mido Now Coaching Zamalek- King Fut

Well it is nice to know that guy is still alive.

A Reminder Of Just How Good Zidane Was- SB Nation Soccer

Zidane was exactly as good as Zlatan think he -- as in himself -- is.

The Dumbest Transfer Story Of 2014- We Ain't Got No History

How are we not involved in this? I don't understand. It's like it defies the laws of physics in some way.

Norway's Curling Team Will Be The Best Dressed In That Den Of Homophobia Called Russia- SB Nation

"Are those Christmas jammies?" Thank you, it's been a good run, but If you need me I will be killing myself out behind a shed for that last reference.

And Now Olympic Weight Lifters Twerking- SB Nation Look It

Look at how fun that headline is! LOOK AT IT!  And yet this is the least fun video maybe ever. It might be less funny than the pain Olympics video from 10 years ago.