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The player Tottenham can't get rid of

Gomes will be here forever. He will haunt your dreams. He will get sent off at the San Siro in your sleep until the day you die.

Robert Cianflone

Over the weekend, Gomes posted on his Instagram account that he was off to Eindhoven. Many assumed this meant he was going to leave Tottenham to play for PSV Eindhoven. These people were wrong and made an assumption that ignores history: Gomes isn't leaving because Gomes never leaves.

Here's part of his follow-up message, attached to a picture of his Tottenham shirt.

"Yesterday I shared a picture, and I wrote ‘off to Eindhoven', but I didn't say that I was going back to PSV, I went there because I have still got friends there and I went to visit one of them ... Thank you so much for the all best wishes that I received from my Spurs fans and the welcome messages that I received from my PSV fans, but I'm not going anywhere yet! God bless you all!"

He's not going anywhere. Ever. Gomes will haunt us forever.

Wherever he goes, Gomes will have to take a big pay cut, and he's probably not terribly interested in doing that when he doesn't have to. He can collect another half-season of large wages, then go to a team that will play him. It's not a terrible arrangement.