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Friday Morning Hoddle Of COffee: Tottenham Hotspur News And Links November 28, 2014

Can you please go out and buy Spurs a win?

Ian Walton/Getty Images

Happy Black Friday Spursland! For you guys in not America black Friday is a day of big sales in America that goes back forever. How far back does it go? Well it's called Black Friday because the day after Thanksgiving was traditionally a big slave market sales day when Slaves were sold at cut rate prices to do winter prep activities like cut wood and winterize plantation houses in the south. Get it? Black Friday. [Editor's note: I'm pretty sure that's not true.] And in modern times we trample each other over food processors and generally act in a way only seen outside America in Eastern European parliamentary debates. What a country.

And now the "news"

Three Pitch invaders May Be Connected-BBC

The important thing to remember here isn't that UEFA will surely be fining us, but that Soldado tried to kick one of them...and missed.  It is also important to remember that if you got in line outside Walmart yesterday at 9 am to be the 9th person in the door, I think less of you as a human being.

Earphone Company Appalled By Pitch Invasions-SB Nation

That's exactly what a guilty person would say (If that makes no sense I'm from America, a country where corporations are people) if questioned about it.

Ghosts At River Plate-SB Nation Soccer

That ghost needs to wash his or her clothes.

Avram Grant Is Alive, Now Managing Ghana-SB Nation Soccer

He's there for brothel scene. Probably.

A Proposal To Fix NBA Conference Imbalance-SB Nation

This seems cool...Who am I kidding I'm full of stuffing and bourbon I don't know what words I'm typing.