As you all know, former Tottenham Hotspur manager Andre Villas-Boas has moved on to Zenit St. Petersburg in Russia, who he could very well manage in the Champions League next fall. Because Zenit are likely to be in the Champions League and because they have money, they're going to be linked to Spurs players.
Enter Football Direct News, one of many sites that populate the seedy underbelly of the internet with transfer rumors. They have quotes from an anonymous source stating that Younes Kaboul and Paulinho are among AVB's top transfer targets this summer.
"Villas-Boas is prepared to make many changes to his team this summer," a European football insider explained. "He wants Kaboul for his defence, and, as you say, Paulinho and Moutinho are targets for midfield."
Of course, if these players or their agents have done any reading up on Zenit, they probably won't be too keen on going unless the money's insane. Dick Advocaat once said that the fans wouldn't let him sign black players and Luciano Spalletti danced on the line in that respect, signing mixed-race players who have been the subject of abuse, albeit by a minority of supporters.
This is in the "Dispatches from Batcountry" section because I'm not going to ask you to take anything from Football Direct News seriously, but this post is here to serve as a warning to everyone: There will be lots of Spurs players to Zenit rumors this summer. Some will be credible. More will be crap.
Sorry you have to deal with this.