Happy Cinco de Mayo Spursland! Ah yes, a day of celebration for really only one part of Mexico and in America mistaken constantly for Mexican Independence Day. It commemorates the Mexican victory over the French forces of Napoleon... no not that one, another s**ttier Napoleon. But either way wherever you are enjoy the opportunity to over pay for mediocre margaritas.
And now the "news"
That title is too perfect.
So be prepared for a lot of terrible jokes from Piers Morgan's twitter account.
This seems like bullying. "If you don't have anything nice to say, best not get hired as a blogger and state facts," that's what my mother always said.
I... what? Am I still speaking English? I am not even sure what language this is. Is this earth? This reminds me, how I am feeling right now, of how they say going through a black hole would feel like. I'm light headed.