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Monday Morning Hoddle Of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News And Links July 20, 2015

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Clint Dempsey = Julia Louis Dreyfus. FUCHT.

Jon Durr-USA TODAY Sports

Happy Monday Spursland! Are you feeling good? Rested? Sunburned? IDK because you need to wake up to the fact that despite what some boiled langoustine of a bureaucrat says we should do about our year in between stadiums, this summer has undeniably been going swimmingly, so far. We are moving out the unwanted and unneeded fellas for way more many than they are worth, and in a lot of cases moving to places where they will play and be appreciated by the fans.  These are good things.  Great things even, because one now we have more money to spend and room in the wage bill.  And secondly we have done a lot of OUR business so we have time for late deadline crazy transfer deals.  So lets sit back relax and lounge around by the pool today basking in the knowledge that ..wait... Oh damn it I forgot Mondays are for work.  I knew this was to good to be true.  Ugh the boss is sure to stick me on Mary's team for this new project now and she will do nothing but explain her theory that Hilary Clinton had Bill Clinton's white house chef killed and made look like a freak hiking accident because he alone knew all her secrets.  (This is a complete fabrication and not at all based on real events).

And now the "news"

Spurs Have No Intention Of Selling Mousa Dembele-ESPN FC

Because he is pretty good when used right and he has lots of top level experience, isn't too old and isn't Ryan Mason.  You need more reasons? Well I ain't thinking of anymore and you can't make me.

Hugo Lloris: Should He Stay or Should He Go?-F Comme Football

A nice little bit of French perspective from Commentariat member turned indie blogger GFlamou!

Dempsey Scores First USMNT Hat Trick-SB Nation

I used to (OK still do) have this theory that Julia Louis Dreyfus had to have made some sort of Devil and Daniel Webster type of deal way back when. Because I'll give you you can be born into a family worth billions, or be cast on SNL, or be the second lead on the greatest TV show of all time, or get somehow more attractive into you late 50s. But you can't do all three. Then there is Clint Dempsey, who became a world class footballer despite growing up in Texas pre-USMNT success, has a somewhat listenable rap album (I am not a good judge of this I just went with advice from a friend), and is well past the usual prime for football players and is still kicking ass.  So maybe there are two people that get to live those lives?

What Made Fabian Delph Change His Mind?-7500 To Hotle

Money.

Pro Surfer Fights Off Shark Attack On Live TV (Video)-SB Nation

Don't watch this unless you want to forever look at the ocean with the same kind of fear my little sister does because I made her watch JAWS in it's entirety at the age of three.