The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Wednesday, August 12

Happy Wednesday, Spurs fans. I miss Salmon Chase. He's been out of commission for over three weeks now, and I want him back desperately. Not only because he's significantly better about typing out a few paragraphs of stream-of-consciousness stuff every day than I am, he's also quite a bit funner than me.

I have found myself up past my bedtime writing the Hoddle for several days now and I suddenly understand the depth of the commitment that the Hoddle entails. Mr. Chase and his predecessor, theroosevelts, have been churning out news and link posts for your morning commute reading for about four years now, virtually without repeating themselves. That's dedication.

Which is why I propose we start up a GoFundMe campaign to get Mr. Chase a proper new laptop so he can get back to his completely volunteer, unpaid, thankless job as soon as we can.

And now, the "news"

Aston Villa preparing a move for Andros Townsend? - Daily Star

This feels plausible. Yes, Andros has been injured, but Clinton N'Jie appears to be on his way in, and Andros would seem to be the odd winger out. With Andros being home-grown and a decently good player, Spurs wouldn't have too much trouble selling him, and getting a good price for him.

Levy to United on Kane sale: LOL NO - The Guardian

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no seriously we're done here.

Keisuke Honda linked with Milan to Tottenham switch - tuttomercattoweb

I own a Honda. I love it. It's not flashy, but it's reliable and gets me from point A to point B. That said, I purchased it in 2010, there are parts starting to wear out, and its resale value has gone way down to the point where if I'd buy another model I'd probably go for something three or four years newer. Do you see where I'm going with this?

New York Jets QB Geno Smith punched by teammate over $600, out 6-12 weeks - SB Nation

Hey Jets fans, I hear Tim Tebow is available.