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A Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links January 6, 2016

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What to say Wednesday

Alex Livesey/Getty Images

Happy Wednesday, Spursland!

Erm, I can't think of a good theme for today or offer any glowing insight into this weekend's match, seeing as it's FA Cup third round action, so I'm going with it. I have nothing good to say and my mom taught me well so I'm going to say nothing.

Well, sort of.

While thinking about how little I had to offer, I started to think of times Spurs have left me literally speechless, and could only muster one.

People say they were speechless all the time, but it's just a thing to say. Common hyperbole. I actually have an instant where I struggled to speak for a bit.

It was the fixture a couple years back where we played Manchester City and Ledley King committed a penalty at the death which Mario Balotelli (who had stamped Scott Parker's head earlier) converted to seal the win. I was upset, but loved Ledley way too much to slag him off even a little, so I just sat with my friend, Ben, in a kind of shocked silence. I think I may have even said "what can we do?" or something to that effect to remind myself that it was okay to carry on.

Despite years of ups and downs, foolishness and glory, that has been the only time I simply had nothing to say.

If only you all could be so lucky again.

And now for the "news":

Tottenham and Liverpool target could be Celtic bound| Daily Mail

So weird that Spurs and Liverpool are reported to be in on the same player. I mean, what are the odds?

Is Dembele going to Roma| Daily Star

Not what most of you want to hear as our search for a striker who isn't Harry Kane continues. Harry's legs and lungs gently weep. Then again, it's the Daily Star--dirty toilet paper has about as much transfer rumor credibility.

Oh look we're linked to Axel Witsel again| Express

If this transfer rumor actually ends up with a switch, I look forward to countless highlight videos to Axel Foley's theme song.

Ronda Rousey to host 'Saturday Night Live'| MMA Fighting

That's not even the craziest revelation. They're remaking Road House!