Today, Harry Kane posted on his Instagram account a photo of him enjoying the dulcet sounds of a Justin Bieber concert, and naturally, it got posted to the Carty Free writer’s room, where we all enjoyed it immensely.
We’ve had a bit about Harry for a while now that’s primarily perpetuated on Wheeler Dealer Radio about his inclinations as a savvy consumer of popular media, and it got us thinking. Okay, so Harry’s a Bieberite. (Bieber-Bro? Bieber-Lieber?) How much would we pay to get a glimpse of his personal Spotify?
More topically, Christmas is coming up. Based on what we know about Harry Kane, what would be the songs on Harry Kane’s iPhone as part of his holiday playlist? Here are our best guesses.
Justin Bieber – “Mistletoe”
Low hanging fruit, but come on. This has to be on there. You can imagine Harry going to the concert, coming home all amped up on post-Bieber vibes, adolescent hormones, and the lingering scent of Axe body spray, and immediately jumping on iTunes to buy the Bieber Christmas album.
Mariah Carey – “All I Want for Christmas is You”
We like to think that 75% of Harry Kane’s Christmas playlist is just this song played on repeat.
Band-Aid 30: “Do They Know It’s Christmas”
Look, I’m old enough that I remember the original (and prefer it as a staple in ‘80s pop playlists), but we’re not talking about me. The 2014 re-make features not only Bono, Sinead O’Connor and Seal (because of course), but more topically every member of One Direction AND Ed Sheeran. Which makes it a lock for Harry’s Christmas playlist.
Backstreet Boys – “Christmas Time”
The question isn’t “Does Harry Kane have Backstreet Boys on his iPhone,” it’s “How MUCH Backstreet Boys does Harry Kane have on his iPhone.”
Pentatonix – “The Little Drummer Boy”
When we discussed what we thought Harry Kane’s favorite Christmas song might be, the immediate answer was “The Little Drummer Boy,” which feels perfect. I stumbled upon this version by Pentatonix, which feels right up Kane’s alley. I think Harry Kane loves him some a cappella. I think he listens to this before December Premier League matches. Theennnnn... he scored again, ba-rum-pa-pum-pummmm!
Gayla Peevey – “I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas”
I dunno, this just seems like the kind of song Harry Kane would probably find hilarious.
Boyzone – “Put A Little Love In Your Heart”
When running this past the other writers on staff, Bryan A was adamant that “Harry Kane would have a Boyzone song on his playlist.” This was the first hit in Google for “Boyzone Christmas video.” I don’t know anything about Boyzone... are there always fake Muppets in their videos? Do they always dress in Santa suits and sing non-Christmas songs? Does Harry Kane still watch English children’s shows? I have so many questions.
Thurl Ravenscroft – “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch”
“Hahaha, mates, mates, you’ve got to listen to this, it sounds JUST LIKE OUR CHAIRMAN!”
What songs do YOU think Harry Kane will be listening to this holiday season? Put your suggestions in the comments.