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A Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links March 30, 2016

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Are we there yet?

Alex Morton/Getty Images

Good morning!

We've waited long enough for the Premier League's return and, like children packed into the car on the way to Granny's house, we have the right to now if we're close to our destination.

Fine, so we're not that close, only midweek. I guess there are other things to talk about. Kyle Walker and Danny Rose for one. They had themselves...how about now? We have to be close, right?

No? Oh, ok. Anyway, where was I? That's right our fullbacks. The duo were flying in the match against the Netherlands despite the final scoreline, and it's funny to think how at times this season people have assumed they are not the preferred partnership for Tottenham when push comes to shove.

And I swear I would love to talk more about this, but you just passed the turn! Right there is where!! Good god no, don't keep going because you're enjoying this conversation. I know we never talk about international football anymore, but did you ever stop to think that was by design, hmmmm?? Come on, now, I didn't mean to take that tone. You know I respect you; it's this break, you see, it's got me irritable. I'm sorry. No, no, don't be silly, you have nothing to apologize for. Let's just not talk of international breaks for a few months and this should all blow over.

And now for the "news":

Goal scoring youngster could be in line for a Tottenham switch| Sport Witness

This is a fun rumor that will get FC Utrecht and his youtube page a nice spike in views as football hipsters everywhere look to get the jump on this kid before the Sun starts quoting fake prices in mid-June.

Seven things "you" didn't know about Dele Alli| Mirror

I knew all of these things and can't decide if listing the Liverpool thing is rubbing salt in the festering wound that is their scouting department or to troll us somehow. As if that's a thing. He actually plays for us. I don't care who he supported two years ago.

Jurgen Klinsmann wishes his critics were respectful| SB Nation Soccer

Most of these people are Man Utd, Chelsea, Arsenal, Liverpool, Bayern, Barcelona or straight MLS fans. That's just an objective fact. What makes him think they understand the pecking order and development process of a national project?