Bat Country: Bayern in for Spurs midfielder

Welcome to Dispatches from Bat Country, where we here at Cartilage Free Captain find the stupidest, zaniest, and insane rumors of the transfer season and tell you why you shouldn’t get wound up about a possible move.

England resume their Euro 2016 campaign this evening against Iceland, and while the best players from the Premier League are still focusing on trying to advance to the quarterfinals, it doesn’t stop outlets from writing rumors that make your head hurt. Just as a fair warning, the rabbit hole is deep on this one.

Today’s #BatCountry rumor comes to us from The Independent, which aren’t a usual suspect in our hierarchy of crazy rumors. They aren’t the best, but this seems kind of low even for them. According to the London-based outlet, Tottenham are going to have to fend off Bayern Munich for 22-year-old defensive midfielder Eric Dier, who has has been the best English player at the European Championships.

The 22-year-old has excelled for Roy Hodgson’s men this summer, scoring a fierce free-kick on the opening weekend against Russia, while also proving to be the backbone of the side throughout the group stages.

Dier is deployed in a defensive midfield role for both club and country but has demonstrated his goal-scoring abilities also, scoring a bullet header for England against Germany in a friendly earlier in the year.

According to The Sun, Bayern are growing increasingly keen on the former Sporting Libson star and are plotting an audacious swoop this summer.

While it remains unlikely that Tottenham, facing a return to the Champions League stage next season, would be prepared to sell, it is likely to boil down to Dier’s desire to stay at White Hart Lane.

These claims aren’t exactly outlandish. Dier has raised eyebrows with his ability to be the glue that holds England together in midfield, but with this coming from The Sun, we have to see what’s there, though given The Sun’s track record, you can probably guess what’s there.

TOTTENHAM could suffer from Eric Dier’s stand-out Euro 2016 performances for England with Bayern Munich taking notice of his form.

The 22-year-old has been one of – if not the – best players in Roy Hodgson’s squad in France this summer.

That’s the opening to the story, and after scrolling through some pictures and bad advertisements, we find that The Sun are quoting the other usual suspect of #BatCountry in England, The Mirror, which refer to the "Sunday People" section of their online publication.

Tottenham’s defensive midfielder has been arguably the pick of Roy Hodgson’s players during the European Championship – prompting enquiries from the German giants.

Backroom staff at the five-time European Cup winners have been making background checks on the England international during the last few days.

Several contacts within the Premier League have been asked for further details on the player’s character as the German club builds up a dossier on the versatile 22-year-old.

As expected, there’s nothing here but unnamed sources. There are no quotations from Dier, his agent, Bayern officials or Tottenham officials. We also have to remember that Dier signed a new five year deal in the past year so Spurs hold practically all the leverage here, even if this were actually a thing.

But, this isn’t a thing. Dier isn’t going anywhere. He is one of Pochettino’s first names on the lineup card and there has been nothing but smiles from him in North London. Also, Dele Alli would probably be insanely lonely if Dier decided to leave, and we don’t want to live in a world where we don’t have daily bromance updates from them.