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Monday Hoddle of Coffee: News and Links for September 25th 2017

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West Ham United v Tottenham Hotspur - Premier League Photo by Mike Hewitt/Getty Images

Good morning Spursland!

If you’re anything like me, then your pulse has probably only just about returned to normal after the final 20 minutes of Saturday’s away win over West Ham (cheers, Serge Aurier!). You’ve thus got a super-chilled track from Mac DeMarco as your Hoddle Theme of the Day to help you settle back down into the working week, and then below that your links. Enjoy!

Links

Mauricio Pochettino has declared himself “in love” with Harry Kane after the striker’s superbly-taken brace secured the win at the London Stadium. BACK OFF BRO WE SAW HIM FIRST

Meanwhile Kane’s cuddly deputy Vincent Janssen has claimed that he’s found “salvation” since joining Fenerbahce on loan. No doubt Poche has some heartfelt words for Vin as well after watching him net twice in three games in Istanbul.

Elsewhere in football...

Ronald Koeman may have once taken away Oumar Niasse’s locker at the Everton training ground but he couldn’t rob him of his skill, as the Senegalese demonstrated in kindly handing his manager a rather undeserved lifeline against Bournemouth.

The first Steel City derby in five years was an absolute cracker, with Sheffield United turning over local Championship rivals Sheffield Wednesday 4-2 in a barnstorming game that was far from a hoot for the Owls (sorry).

Over in Serie A- Milan’s new owners may have spent a hundred trillion euros over the summer trying to make them look a little less like Milan, but I regret to inform you that they are still very much Milan.

And finally...

Reprinting claims made in a report in Spanish paper El Pais, the Metro has reported that Edinson Cavani has been offered €1m by the higher-ups at PSG to surrender his penalty-taking duties to Neymar. Just saying guys- if you want to pay someone to literally not play football for you, my demands are faaaaar more reasonable.