The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Tuesday, December 4

Hello, everyone!

I’m skipping Harry Redknapp today for two reasons: one, I didn’t have the time; two, it’s a very special day for yours truly. It’s my Hoddle-versary!

Ramble of the Day

The first anniversary, according to people that keep track of these things, is technically the paper anniversary, so I’ll ramble about paper. I will attempt to make this as good a ramble as I can, but honestly, I’m using today’s ramble to take a break from something else I’m also trying to make sure is good. I’m veering off-topic, so let me straighten up and let me share the idea: I’m going to do a paper power rankings.

Before I get started, I will share that I am a pretty big fan of paper. I’m well aware that they pose the risk of paper cuts, and I am thankful that I do not spend as much time with paper as I did when I was a student for that reason. That said, I am a big fan of notebooks, though I do not use them enough, and just jotting things down, even though I do not do that enough. It will not surprise you, at this point, that I will put that type of paper at the top of the power rankings, but let’s go through the others and discover if I have any hot takes.

1. College ruled paper: This is one of the most practical types of paper, and it is a classic. I will admit that this type of paper seems somewhat unnecessary in certain walks of life — I can’t remember the last time I genuinely needed a piece of looseleaf paper, but I have used some recently because I like it. I’ll also admit that as someone who likes her own handwriting, I might like it better than others do.
2. Parchment paper: I’m a little bit surprised at how high I just ranked parchment paper, but it is so easy to just stick some vegetables on a tray covered with the stuff and roast them. The clean-up job is easy, which makes the cooking experience easier and gets you to eating faster. Of course I was going to put some food-related paper high up this list.
3. Printer paper: Practical like looseleaf, it’s good for — you guessed it — printing stuff out. I don’t print things so much anymore, so the only reason I would use it otherwise is to write things down and that would be a mistake. I cannot write in straight lines without guides, and I sometimes even screw that up. I respect printer paper, but I’m not so sure we go well together.
4. Sandpaper: I’m running out of types of paper, but sandpaper has a very specific use. It’s not exactly bad, but it’s not relevant to me and probably most people. I feel like there was an elementary school teacher that had a negative connotation with sandpaper and that still is on my mind. I did recently sand some shelves, though, so I do respect sandpaper and find it rather easy to deal with.
5. Construction paper: Cool as a kid, not so much as an adult. It outgrows its usefulness very quickly, and I can’t say I love its texture. (Pretty funny after I just wrote about sandpaper.)
6. Tissue paper: Is supposed to be pretty but is very easy to mess up. I enjoy the colorful aspect, but the flimsiness is unattractive as a form of paper.

I Googled “types of paper” and decided to stop here. Six is enough for a ramble.

tl;dr: The paper anniversary.

Links of the Day

FIFA is looking into claims that members of the Afghanistan Football Federation physically and sexually abused members of the women’s national team.

UEFA has confirmed that VAR will be used in the Champions League from the Round of 16 onwards.

A French DJ has apologized for asking Ada Hegerberg to twerk right after she won the Ballon d’Or yesterday.

England will host the 2021 Women’s European Championships.

Southampton have fired Mark Hughes after an eight-month stint at the club.

Today’s longer read: Darren Tulett interviews Brighton’s Anthony Knockaert on battling depression for The Guardian