The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News and Links for Thursday, February 1

Hey, everyone!

The transfer window is closed, and Tottenham have coupled their shiny new signing with a fabulous win over Manchester United. (For those of you wondering, I did enjoy the Lucas Moura announcement video.)

Anyway, let me tell you about my day yesterday.

Ramble of the Day

Yesterday, I popped into a nice little coffee shop to get some work done. It was the first time I had been there, and I did my research beforehand, with many saying it was a quiet place. Should be good in my attempt to be productive, I thought.

For the first hour, it was exactly that. I got my work done and enjoyed some coffee. People kept walking in and out, but no one was even close to disruptive. Then a man with a bun walked in.

He started by ordering his drink rather loudly. I did not make anything of it; some people are just naturally very loud. Plus, he will probably be gone soon enough. It should not be a problem, I told myself.

Then he made that unwritable sound one makes when they recognize someone, only he did not know that person. The person, being normal, did not respond, leading Man Bun to start loudly interrogating him about what he did all day. Man Bun was then told to quiet down by the barista. He started to act out.

First, he dragged a stool across the floor to cause a disturbance. Then, when asked to be quiet again, he said he would not just buy coffee, he would buy the whole shop. He then attempted to kick people out, though no one listened. A mother and her son soon walked into the place; he screamed, “No children allowed!” He was told, once again, to be quiet.

After a little bit more of his show, it was suddenly quiet. I had assumed he left, even though I thought it bizarre that he would leave unceremoniously. Then again, I had begun to tune him out, only hearing the sounds and not the words. Turns out, Man Bun was just in the bathroom.

He came out, his hair no longer in the bun, and he was yelling again. He ended up by a table with his bag, and when the barista came over to quiet him down again, she saw he had alcohol in there. “You’re not allowed to have alcohol in here,” she said.

He yelled some more, of course. (His coffee was ready a long time ago, by the way.) I could no longer watch the show; I had work to do, after all. Then, as quietly as he walked in, he noiselessly left with his friend, who seemingly did not exist until that moment. (There is clearly only one friend that does the talking in this duo.) He, thankfully, did not return and the rest of us lived in peace.

tl;dr: Some disruptive man with a bun walked into a coffee shop I was sitting in yesterday and it was not fun.

Would you like some links?

Links of the Day

A neatly packaged summary of the bigger Deadline Day news, as they happened.

Speaking of transfers, Braga announced the signing of Diogo Figueiras in a Netflix-inspired video.

Mauricio Pochettino has called yesterday’s victory over Manchester United one of his side’s best performances at Wembley.

The longer read is from last week, but it is an interesting read about Italian football language.