The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News and Links for Wednesday, February 21

Hey, everyone!

My younger sister’s former classmate, Nicole Rajicova, did well in the ladies’ singles short program last night. Feel free to read more about her from The Observer, the newspaper of the school we all went to (and that I have written for), since she is pretty impressive.

Anyway, here’s something else about figure skating.

Ramble of the Day

With the Olympics still happening, I have been watching a lot of figure skating. I have stayed up far too late to finish it out on a few occasions because I have gotten so invested. What’s seven more if you have watched the rest, right? Anyway, one obviously very important part of a figure skater’s program is the choice of music they perform to, and me being me, I have opinions to share.

Some of them pick out some fairly unentertaining tunes. The music of choice lacks drama and fades into the background, providing little ambiance for a performance. I do not remember most of these performances, since the music dragged down the rest of it to my untrained eye, but German duo Kavita Lorenz and Joli Polizoakis stick out in my mind. Their free dance to the soundtrack of the 2005 film adaptation of Pride & Prejudice was not the most exciting of the night.

The music choices that stand out the most, though, are the ones that are more lively, and sometimes more well known. The results are mixed. Alex and Maia Shibutani, the American bronze medalists in ice dancing, did their routine to Coldplay’s “Paradise,” an obviously lame choice. They managed, though, to match the tonal changes of the music. Additionally, credit must go to France’s Maé-Bérénice Méité, who may not have not have nailed her short program in the ladies’ singles competition, but had a fun compilation of Beyoncé’s “Halo” and “Run the World (Girls)” to go along with it.

Then there are the noteworthy skaters who who make genuinely bad choice, in terms of actual music and its compatibility with the performance. Ice dance silver medalists Gabriella Papadakis and Guillaume Cizeron of France did their short program to a bizarre mix of Ed Sheeran’s “Shape of You” and “Thinking Out Loud” that rivaled Papadakis’ dress and the neckline of Cizeron’s top.

Photo by Maddie Meyer/Getty Images

None were as noticeably bad as the three — three! — ice dancing duos that came out to “Despacito” in the competition’s short program. China’s Liu Xinyu and Wang Shiyue were the first, followed by Korean pair Yura Min and Alexander Gamelin, and Poland’s Natalia Kaliszek and Maksym Spodyriev completed the hattrick. The problem was not that these three pairs chose the song; none of them did Luis Fonsi and Daddy Yankee justice. The performances did not tonally match “Despacito,” including the one pair that performed to an inferior cover.

I must admit that I do appreciate the attempt to liven things up from these skaters, considering I would probably pick a more up-tempo song, too. Then again, the one and only time I was on an ice rink was an absolute disaster because I have no balance and I never want to return to an ice rink, so I probably should not be talking.

tl;dr: I do not enjoy figure skating programs performed to boring songs, weird remixes, or songs that do not match the tempo of the performance.

Links of the Day

Here’s a story about a guy that looks like Harry Kane.

Will Grigg watched a replay of Wigan’s FA Cup victory over Manchester City until 4:00 a.m.

West Ham have been charged by the FA after violating some anti-doping rules.

Isaac Drogba, son of Didier, has joined Ligue 1 team Guingamp.

David Squires has had his say on the West Brom players who stole a taxi in Barcelona (in cartoon format, obviously).

Today’s longer read: A profile of the prolific Robert Lewandowski, as told by Tom Williams for Bleacher Report.