The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News and Links for Tuesday, May 29

Hi, people!

Let’s go back to Twitter for today’s ramble.

Ramble of the Day

I feel like we do not talk about Tottenham assistant coach Jesús Pérez enough. More specifically, I feel like we do not talk about his Twitter account enough. He’s not an incredibly active tweeter, but it’s almost all Tottenham-related, and it is fairly enjoyable.

I remembered how much I enjoyed his content the other day, when he decided to react to the club’s new player accommodation Lodge and provide us with a mathematical equation at the same time. (If you haven’t taken a chance to look at the The Lodge, you should. It is swanky.)

If I’m reading that correctly, a combination of cheering for the team, love, football, eating, and sleeping equals a strong, fist-bumping Spurs team. The eating and sleeping, and perhaps the football, too, seemed a bit obvious for the new accommodations, but I was unaware there would be a lot of love and cheering. Seems like a pretty good recipe for success, and seems fairly doable for anyone that won’t be staying at The Lodge. Most of you do the cheering bit and a lot of you also complete the football and love requirement, too, but I would also encourage eating and sleeping for anyone. I like the equation.

If you could not tell from that tweet, Pérez is genuinely a big fan of emojis. He tends to commemorate most relatively significant days at work with emoji-laden tweets.

He’s also a big fan of highly attended matches.

He doesn’t mind a bit of Spurs-related Photoshop, either.

That is definitely not how White Hart Lane was proportioned. Nice that you like the fan art, though, Jesús. Here’s another one just for fun.

Love the use of emoji on that one, but I am also a bit confused by it. Why is he winking after “#COYS?” Is he joking about it? This was posted hours after the team’s 2-1 victory over Borussia Dortmund, which, now that I think about it, does not help me understand it. Perhaps he thinks of winks differently than I do. I can make sense of that hang loose emoji as a celebration of the stellar Champions League campaign, though.

Pérez’s best tweet, though, came right after Spurs clinched a spot in the top four after beating Newcastle.

Let’s talk about the selected image first. The message is nice, if a bit cliché, but it looks like something plastered on a wall in a grade school classroom. As I’m sure many of you have noticed by now, that is not the most important part of this tweet. It is, as it clearly frequently is with Pérez, all about the emoji usage, and he picked out a notable bunch. Mixed with the waves and the shrugging are ... a trio of middle fingers. I guess this could have been an accident, but no one with any influence has gotten him to take it down. Perhaps it’s intentional, though I have no idea who this sentiment is meant for. I suppose I will leave it for you all to figure out.

tl;dr: A deep dive into Jesús Pérez’s Twitter account.

Links of the Day

Liverpool have signed midfielder Fabinho from Monaco.

The FA has officially reorganized its women’s leagues, announcing which sides will play in the Women’s Super League and the Women’s Championship.

Coventry are on their way to League One after beating Exeter 3-1 in the playoff final.

According to reports, Chelsea owner Roman Abramovich is now a citizen of Israel.

Lionel Messi would trade a title with Barcelona if it meant he would win the World Cup.

Today’s longer read: Jeff Reuter on the difficulties faced by lower division clubs in America when they compete in the U.S. Open Cup for The Guardian