The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News and Links for Wednesday, May 30

Hi, everyone!

I got a Joe Hart Panini sticker last night. It was pretty awkward.

Ramble of the Day

Once again, I am sharing with you something I found from the world of social media. This time, the subject is Manchester City’s Phil Foden, who recently celebrated his 18th birthday and took to Instagram to share his celebrations. Mixed in with pictures of himself and some loved ones celebrating, he shared a picture of his cake.

To begin, I’d like to wish Foden a happy birthday. I hope he had a fun day!

Now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, I think it’s time to break down Foden’s birthday cake. Let’s tackle the text on the cake stand by asking the incredibly important question: Who is Ronnie?

After my older sister perused the comments of the Instagram post, it turns out that the man born Philip Walter Foden is nicknamed Ronnie. I can only guess that the nickname is a reference to Cristiano Ronaldo, aka Ronnie to almost no one (though I must admit that I do call him that sometimes), but I have no further leads.

Let’s talk about that cake, though. I hope it’s tasty, but look at that design. He got a Gucci cake. A Gucci cake! He’s got a belt and ... a wallet on that cake? Or is that one of those small bags? You know, like the ones I rambled about a couple of months ago?

This has to be a bit of a joke of a cake, right? It doesn’t have his real name on it, and it has Gucci goods on it. I don’t think anyone can be obsessed with Gucci enough to ask for that kind of cake, but I do believe that someone can buy so many Gucci products that his friends and family say he’s obsessed with the brand and get him a cake to poke fun at him.

If that is the case, I will applaud those who were responsible for getting that cake made. It is pretty funny, and I have been able to convince myself that there are answers to the questions I have had. What a satisfying ramble.

tl;dr: The curious case of Phil Foden’s birthday cake.

Links of the Day

Harry Kane is one of the cover stars of the Sports Illustrated World Cup preview edition.

A report from Women in Football has found that there has been an almost 400% increase in the number of reports of sex discrimination and harassment.

Cincinnati is getting an MLS team, and will begin play next year.

The latest David Squires cartoon is about Liverpool’s defeat in the Champions League final.

Today’s longer read: David Rudin on the not-so conflicting relationship between statistics and aesthetics for StatsBomb