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The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Wednesday, January 30

Horror in the image of Disney.

Tottenham Hotspur v Juventus - Pre-Season Friendly Photo by Michael Regan/Getty Images

Hey, everyone!

I’ll just get to it.

Ramble of the Day

I read an article from The Guardian yesterday about a £151 million ghost town, where someone decided to build 300 identical castles in Turkey for rich people to purchase as vacation homes. The article’s worth a read, because it goes into the reasons why the project was abandoned and how that serves as a reflection on Turkey’s economic troubles, so I won’t summarize the rest of it here. I come with a small comment, but it first requires looking at a picture of this place:

It’s pretty wild ... and pretty creepy.

My younger sister said that it looks like it could be the set of a horror film, and I now hope Jordan Peele, or some other horror movie maker of your choice, will get started working on this soon. (I don’t want to impose, though, because Peele doesn’t need me to tell him how to do his job, and maybe someone else is better suited for the job. I’m not a horror movie expert.)

It looks like Disney gone wrong, so perhaps this horror movie could be like an adult version of a Disney film in the vein of Snow White and the Huntsman and Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters. It doesn’t have to be as bad as those movies; Snow White has a 49% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, and Hansel & Gretel has an impressive 15% on the site, so hopefully this adult Disney horror film will be shooting higher. (Then again, I doubt the filmmakers involved were aiming that low.)

Maybe all of the Disney princesses — and princes, why not? — can come out of the castles as zombie versions of themselves to haunt unassuming Disney park guests. It’s a little bit like a Jurassic Park, in a sense: People should probably know by now that they shouldn’t be visiting this place, especially if it takes place in modern day, but they go and almost die. There’s a conceivable world in which this film takes place at an earlier time period, but then does it get too close to Jurassic Park? I’m no screenwriter, and I haven’t spent enough time coming up with the story, anyway.

Regardless, it’s a free idea for anyone that wants it. If you make it big, a little bit of credit would be nice, in a verbal and financial sense, so I guess it isn’t a totally free idea. I guess I’ll call it a cheap idea.

tl;dr: Someone found a horror movie set.

Links of the Day

The FA will investigate claims that Macclesfield Town manager Sol Campbell was on the receiving end of homophobic abuse by fans of Cheltenham Town.

David Squires recaps some of the weekend’s FA Cup action in his latest cartoon.

Transfer roundup: Paris Saint-Germain has signed Leandro Paredes from Zenit; Juventus has signed Martin Cáceres from Lazio on loan for the remainder of the season; Real Betis has signed Jesé on loan from Paris-Saint Germain; Qatari side Al-Duhail has signed Mehdi Benatia from Juventus

Today’s longer read: Daniel Taylor on the plight of Notts County under the ownership of Alan Hardy for The Guardian