The next ten ailments that will sideline Eric Dier this season

Eric Dier can’t catch a break. Tottenham Hotspur’s defensive midfielder has missed a lot of time this season due to various medical ailments. In mid-December, Dier missed about a month after having his appendix abruptly removed. He returned to the side just long enough to make a couple of cameos but has missed the past couple of matches, ones we expected him to start. Today, the club confirmed that Eric has tonsillitis.

We don’t know if the human body has that many more unnecessary body parts, but we at Cartilage Free Captain put our heads together to try and figure out the next ten ailments that will cause Dier to miss time this season.

We wish Eric well in his future recoveries and hope he will be back fully healthy to start the new Premier League campaign in August. In the mean time, feel free to send him a get-well-soon card.

1. Spleen removal
2. Wisdom teeth removal
3. Chicken pox
4. Pyrophobia
5. Carpal-tunnel syndrome
6. Existential ennui
7. Impacted fibrous artichoke mass
8. Irritable bowel syndrome (linked to recovery from #7)
9. Deep vein thrombosis (from sitting on the bench for so long)
10. Pochetinnitus