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The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Thursday, February 28

A cringeworthy video.

Chelsea FC v Tottenham Hotspur - Premier League Photo by Clive Rose/Getty Images

Hi, everyone!

A quick and brutal ramble awaits.

Ramble of the Day

I don’t know the context behind this video, but West Ham’s Michail Antonio recently decided to teach Jamie Carragher and Gary Neville a couple of dance moves. To the surprise of probably no one, the Sky Sports analysts are not very good.

Carragher, in particular, is very bad at this. Antonio starts them off with a move that requires them to spread both arms out. Neville does that, but Carragher weirdly doesn’t, instead spreading one arm out and keeping the other one bent so his microphone stays by his mouth.

It’s Neville that makes the next obviously wrong move, but it’s more innocently laughable than Carragher’s mistake, for whatever reason. Everyone does a turn, and Neville accidentally turns toward Antonio instead of away from him. He quickly corrects course, and we’re back to normal.

For the finale, Carragher decides to speed up the rhythmic steps for no good reason, and does so with terrible posture and somehow ends up closer to the camera at the end. This all happens in a 15 second period.

I’m not saying I’d be any better — I can’t dance, so I’d probably be bad. Both Carragher and Neville are hilariously bad, though I have to give them credit for trying it. I would never have done so, fully knowing that I’d embarrass myself.

tl;dr: I don’t know why Jamie Carragher and Gary Neville decided to dance like Michail Antonio, but they did.

Links of the Day

The FA is investigating Manchester City over the 2015 signing of Jadon Sancho.

FIFA is investigating the status of Cardiff City’s payments of Emiliano Sala’s transfer fee to Nantes.

Kolo Toure will be an assistant under Brendan Rodgers at Leicester City.

Today’s longer read: Gemma Clarke interviews U.S. women’s national team midfielder McCall Zerboni earning her first cap at age 30, fighting for a spot at June’s World Cup, and her journey for The Guardian