The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Tuesday, May 28

Hello, all!

I’ve made the discovery that being inside of a blanket is much warmer than being outside of one. Shocking, I’m aware.

Ramble of the Day

At this point, Mauricio Pochettino is essentially a known quantity. His football philosophy has been discussed at length. There’s enough information out there about his playing career, and his own life. There’s even a book that fills in the other remaining details. Yet, as much as we know Pochettino and like to talk about Pochettino, one thing continues to not get the attention it deserves. The man is extremely peculiar — dare I say, positively weird — and it is extremely entertaining and amusing.

Never was this clearer on Friday, a day I spent less time than usual on the internet but kept seeing some very particular things coming out of Pochettino’s mouth. He was available to media in Spain in video format, answering expected questions about his future and Harry Kane. He also doubled down on the Buzz Lightyear thing after using the Toy Story character’s catchphrase in a press conference ahead of the home leg of the Ajax tie:

Now, this just seems like the guy embracing the fact that he (maybe accidentally) referenced a Disney character, which isn’t a particularly weird thing. Whether one would have associated Pochettino with Buzz Lightyear several weeks ago might be worth thinking about, but it also might be a conversation for a different time. Pochettino, though, is more interesting than a guy who likes Buzz Lightyear.

So, here’s the thing: I’m not 100% surprised that a man who likes talking about auras and “universal energy” would describe someone as being “connected with the virtual world and the nexus.” I’m...90% surprised, actually. There’s nothing wrong with it; in fact, it’s extremely enjoyable and I love that this might be Jesús Pérez’s reputation amongst his close friends. It’s also weird, but in the best way.

Perhaps the most unexpected thing I saw Pochettino say on Friday, though, came in a talkSPORT interview, in which he talked about the role of lemons in his life. As someone who has a reputation for loving lemons (and limes), I was incredibly curious about what Pochettino, a man of many unexpected words, had to say about them.

There’s a funny Daniel Levy joke in here, but I am really curious about this theory. I wasn’t aware of this concept of lemons working as a barrier, blocking interaction with bad energy, and I think I want to test it now. I do have a couple of questions, though: are the lemons in a bowl, and are they directly in between Pochettino and a visitor to his office? Also: how quickly do the lemons go bad, and does it depend on how bad the energy was?

Perhaps most importantly, I must ask: are you sure there isn’t another way to explain your lemons decaying, like the idea that they’re not supposed to last forever?

Honestly, we as a footballing public have only scratched the surface of Pochettino’s uniqueness. I could go on and on about the things available to us through articles and Brave New World, but I imagine there’s much more from where this comes from.

tl;dr: Mauricio Pochettino is as rare as they come.

Links of the Day

Aston Villa has been promoted to the Premier League.

Brazil’s Marta has injured her left thigh muscle, and will be assessed again in a week.

Neymar has had the Brazilian captaincy taken from him and handed to Dani Alves ahead of the Copa América.

“Three Lions” has been rewritten for the England women’s team in a Lucozade ad ahead of the women’s World Cup.

Today’s longer read: Moises Llorens interviews Dani Alves on his career, aspirations for the future, and a passion for music and fashion for ESPN