Friday Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for June 14

Good morning and Happy Friday!

That’s right, you poor unfortunate souls get to deal with me for a week. While Pardeep enjoys France and takes in some of the Women’s World Cup, I’ll be filling in for her and ranting about things you probably don’t care about. I make no promises, but I will try to keep the wrestling talk to a minimum unless Skipjack talks me into a heel turn.

Let’s talk about E3!

The Electronic Entertainment Expo wrapped up yesterday. The show itself is slowly dying a horrible death since about 2013. Sony didn’t even bother to show up this year and Nintendo stuck to doing their conference via Nintendo Direct, which seems to be a good move for what they bring to the table nowadays.

Back in 2008, I had the opportunity to go E3. I was excited as hell. I had been in the game review industry for about three years at that point and this was my first conference. I had been to a couple of small developer get-togethers which usually consist of a trip out to the west coast for one day and fly right back home. E3 is the show that all gamers back in the day waited for every year!

Unfortunately, E3 2008 was a press-only event, and it was easily the worst in the history of the show. I did get to sit third row center at Nintendo’s conference at the Kodak Theater, but that seemed like a punishment given I watched this dude:

The memes that were spawned were funny, at least. Just don’t watch this gif too long or you might get a seizure.

At the time, I sat in my seat and looked up and down my row at all the journalists I was sitting with. All of us were just shaking our heads.

The show was condensed into one of the media wings of the Staples Center and, instead of the sprawling show that you might see nowadays, it was basically a bunch of offices and one “show floor” with a handful of kiosks. Needless to say, I’ve enjoyed CES far more than E3.

So who “won” E3 this time around? I have some takes. Keep in mind that I’m leaving Google’s Stadia project out of this because we know some things about it, but it wasn’t technically a part of E3 and I’m withholding judgment until October when the full information drops.

WINNER: Microsoft

I’ve been singing their praises since their conference. 60 games on display for all of us to watch, Project xCloud for the future, Ultimate Game Pass AND a new console for next year? That’s a hell of a show. Thumbs up from me, especially now that I don’t have to pay for Xbox Live until 2021.

LOSER: Bethesda

Todd Howard needs to stay away for awhile. He poked a little fun at himself for Fallout 76 and the company tried to turn the backlash of the game into them “listening to their fans” which approximately fourteen people believed. I’m pretty sure they were all sitting front row at their conference yelling out “WOW!” every five seconds. I can’t wait for Obisidian to drop The Outer Worlds and show them what Fallout should actually look like.

WINNER: Nintendo

I never even considered that the Switch could handle The Witcher 3, but here we are. Also, a true sequel to Breath of the Wild would have been more than enough for Nintendo fans.

LOSER: EA

Their show was too long, showed little to nothing of interest, and was basically an admission that Anthem is all but in their rear view mirror. That game had promise, and boy did it die fast.

WINNER: Sony

They may have won just by staying away this year. They’re going to have a bunch of stuff later in the year but they had already talked about the Playstation 5 and 2019 has been good to them. It’s a tad surprising they didn’t show up just to take a victory lap for this generation.

LOSER: Ubisoft

The new Watch Dogs looks fun and I’ve enjoyed the first two titles in the series, but do we really need FIVE Tom Clancy games? Sorry, Ubisoft, but you’ve lost your luster and I don’t know how you’re going to get it back.

WINNER: Square Enix

Say what you want about the Avengers game that doesn’t have the actor likenesses, but it’s an ambitious title and looks like it could be fun. Bringing out an expansion for Final Fantasy XIV satisfies the MMO crowd while Dying Light 2 also looks really good.

Then there’s the tactical nuke they dropped on everyone and the reason why 16 year old me is screaming:

I am going to play the absolute sh*t out of this game.

And now the “news”....

Ben Davies has successful surgery on groin - Samford Crimson News

The Welsh International is expected to miss about 4-6 weeks, but will be able to take part in most of pre-season.

Canadian pundits are Mad On Television about the USWNT’s celebrating. - Deadspin

I’m guessing they’re still mad at the 2012 Olympics. I’m on Team “Celebrations are Fun” with this one:

Australia’s Sam Kerr tells the critics to “suck on that one.”- Fox Sports

No word on if she started cutting a promo with D-Generation X in the locker room ahead of their next match.

Shohei Ohtani’s Superpowers are slowly but surely returning. - Deadspin

If you’re a baseball fan, a healthy Shohei Ohtani is something you want because he’s stupidly good.

An Uber Eats driver will deliver the matchball in every Ligue 1 game - Sports Illustrated

France? We need to have a conversation about sponsorship and selling your soul, because this is incredibly stupid.