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The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Friday, October 23

Joe Jonas in London, on Quibi

Arsenal Women v Tottenham Hotspur Women - Barclays FA Women’s Super League Photo by Tottenham Hotspur FC/Tottenham Hotspur FC via Getty Images

I did something I’d been (half-heartedly) been meaning to do for six months.

Ramble of the Day

Considering the news of Quibi’s imminent death, I decided now was as good a time as any to finally follow through with a Hoddle topic I’ve had for months: watching the episode of Cup of Joe where singer Joe Jonas goes to Tottenham Hotspur Stadium. It was never going to take a long time, and Quibi offers a free trial so all it would cost is time, but you know how it can be with small commitment things — you just kick the task down the road, and if the assignment isn’t particularly exciting, you don’t race to do it.

Since Quibi’s dying, though, I realized I only had a very small window of opportunity to do this fairly simple thing, so I had a spare 10 minutes yesterday and started a 14 day free trial. All I wanted to watch was Cup of Joe — there’s at least one more football thing on Quibi, which I cannot promise I’ll watch before my free trial ends.

Anyway, Jonas is in London for episode five of Cup of Joe, and he’s joined by singer Nicole Scherzinger for the beginning of the seven minute episode. It’s clear that the show takes a very visual approach to tourism, because Jonas nor Scherzinger spend time saying the names of the places they go. Jonas quickly gets a cup of coffee, then goes to Borough Market with Scherzinger, spends a minute at South Bank, and does some pub trivia before heading to Tottenham Hotspur Stadium.

The segment at Tottenham Hotspur Stadium was fairly uneventful — Jonas wore a Spurs kit and tucked his shirt into his shorts, missed his first attempt by a wide margin, and converted his second. He teased in February that he’d talk about the club’s legacy and the sport’s importance to Londoners, and that didn’t quite make it, and we end up with a very surface level look at London — he ends the episode by saying, “in their spare time, Londoners love to have a laugh,” which I can’t imagine that’s particularly unique to Londoners.

That said, Jonas said he had only 10 hours to see the city, and in a show where you only get seven minutes to show what you did, was it possible to accomplish anything other than a superficial depiction of your subject? It’s seemingly par for the course with Quibi, whose big idea of being able to switch seamlessly to and from vertical and horizontal viewing is pointless — when i watched early parts of the episode vertically, Scherzinger was completely cut out of the screen.

Was it a waste of time? I don’t know — I only dedicated 10 minutes total to the whole thing between downloading the app and finishing the episode. I didn’t expect much of it, and I got what I expected. None of it left a lasting impression, which I imagine is not ideal for any of the creative forces behind it but it could always be worse.

tl;dr: I downloaded Quibi to watch Joe Jonas at Tottenham Hotspur Stadium, and it was pretty uninteresting.

Stay informed, read this: Chris Gardner on a talk at Billboard Latin Week between Jennifer Lopez and Maluma where they discussed their upcoming film Marry Me and Latinx talent making it in Hollywood for The Hollywood Reporter

Links of the Day

Birmingham manager Carla Ward tested positive for COVID-19.

Portland Thorns acquired Crystal Dunn in a three-way trade between the North Carolina Courage and OL Reign.

A longer read: Sid Lowe and photographer Pablo Garcia collaborate on a photo essay on the return Deportivo La Coruña supporters for The Guardian