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Carty Free Article Bracket — Redknapp Regional top half

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The first round ends... today!

Sport Coronavirus - Thursday 19th March Photo by John Walton/PA Images via Getty Images

We’re finally at the end of the first round of our Best Article Bracket, and it’s all downhill from here, right?

Let’s go.

Redknapp Regional

FIRST ROUND

#1 — Recurrently Generated Football League: Clood (Ben Daniels)

The RGFL was a great way for many of us to stretch our legs a bit in the writing department, but none of the team writeups caught on the way that Clood did. A football club with weird rituals that worships an Eldritch and Lovecraftian god and that will doom humanity if they ever win the league? What’s not to love? Up the Clood.

#16 — Watch Erik Lamela score a rabona goal in the Europa League (Kim McCauley)

This article probably took Kim about five minutes to write but it completely captures the amazing moment that was Lamela’s rabona goal against Asteras Tripolis. Sadly the highlight has not survived the passage of time, but you can easily find the video on YouTube.

Poll

Pick one.

This poll is closed

  • 63%
    #1 — Recurrently Generated Football League: Clood
    (69 votes)
  • 36%
    #16 — Watch Erik Lamela score a rabona goal in the Europa League
    (39 votes)
108 votes total Vote Now

#8 — Carty Free Poetry Slam: An Ode to Harry (Dustin)

I used to write poetry. This is probably my favorite of the bunch — an ode to Harry Redknapp’s sacking, written in the style of Commander Data’s “Ode to Spot” from Star Trek: The Next Generation. I thought it came out pretty well!

#9 — An Open Letter from Cain Hoy (Skipjack)

There was a point in time when it looked possible that a primarily American-based conglomerate led by Spurs fan Jonathan Goldstein (Cain Hoy) was poised to purchase Tottenham from ENIC. Turns out, they actually made a £1B bid but pulled it shortly afterwards. This article was a satirical open letter from the (extremely) American potential new owners.

Poll

No don’t pick that one... that could be the one.

This poll is closed

  • 51%
    #8 — Carty Free Poetry Slam — An Ode to Harry
    (44 votes)
  • 48%
    #9 — An Open Letter from Cain Hoy
    (41 votes)
85 votes total Vote Now

#4 — Signing Serge Aurier would be an insult to Tottenham fans (Ben Daniels & Michael Caley)

Perhaps the most controversial article ever printed on this blog, it’s also one I’m extremely proud that we published.

#13 — Discovering Home (55thVin)

As an American Spurs fan, you only get one first time at White Hart Lane. This was Vin’s, and it’s a very poignant write-up.

Poll

Just choose already.

This poll is closed

  • 40%
    #4 — Signing Serge Aurier would be an insult to Tottenham fans
    (39 votes)
  • 59%
    #13 — Discovering Home
    (57 votes)
96 votes total Vote Now

#5 — We Are In Fourth Place! An Arsenal Parody (Dustin)

There are only so many times you can do a Don’t Let the Pigeon parody, so I switched gears and moved to Mo Willems’ other big series, Elephant and Piggie, for the second Short Fuse takeover, reimagining them as Meszut Ozil and Alexis Sanchez. Pretty shortly after starting work on it, it became clear my main job was to make Ozil as unhappy as possible.

#12 — Player ratings to the theme of bears (Dustin)

This is basically (and literally) “Bears Are Good MY COLUMN” and was pretty much an excuse to post a whole bunch of photos of fuckin’ awesome bears. Ur welcome.

Poll

Pick your favorite animals.

This poll is closed

  • 63%
    #5 — We Are In Fourth Place! An Arsenal Parody
    (58 votes)
  • 36%
    #12 — Player ratings to the theme of bears
    (33 votes)
91 votes total Vote Now