The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Wednesday, April 1

Hi, Hoddlers!

Today, we have former Tottenham midfielder Andy Sinton at the top. Also, I keep forgetting to formally apologize to Ryan Reynolds for that ramble where I criticized 6 Underground because some of that money clearly went to good causes. You have my full permission to make bad movies if you give the money to some people in need.

Ramble of the Day

A couple of days ago, I informally pitched a bracket of cringeworthy celebrity content during the coronavirus pandemic. I knew not to rush the bracket because the celebrity content would come to me — I wouldn’t have to seek it out. Proving my point is Jeremy Renner, of Jeep advertisements and Jeremy Renner app fame.

Renner not only used the time to release one song, but came out with an entire EP called “The Medicine.” I’ve linked to the EP but have so far only listened to the song that shares a name with the EP — that name, by the way is a little too literal for the times, but that’s hardly the top complaint when it comes to Renner singing.

It’s not as bad as “Main Attraction,” thankfully. Unsurprisingly, I still can’t call myself a fan and I still feel very strongly that his music is not very good. I will continue to ask why Renner continues to feel the need to do this, but as we all found out about the Jeremy Renner app, clearly he’s got a dedicated fanbase.

I try to be reasonable, though. If people enjoy it — and he himself enjoys it — should I really question him so much? I have a feeling I’ll have a better time ignoring his new music, so maybe I shouldn’t complain. That said, Jeremy, considering the aforementioned fanbase, maybe you shouldn’t only resurrect your singing career; maybe you should also bring back your app so we can finally found out if that fan actually went to your house or not.

tl;dr: Jeremy Renner enters the conversation for cringeworthy celebrity coronavirus content, and if he brings back his music career, I say he should bring back his very dramatic app.

Links of the Day

Coronavirus:

• Former Marseille president Pape Diouf died aged 68 from COVID-19.
• Aston Villa’s Pepe Reina is recovering from COVID-19.
• Norwich will furlough staff “unable to work” during the pandemic, but will pay the difference in salaries that the government cannot so employees will receive full salaries.
• Bundesliga teams will not receive point penalties if they enter bankruptcy this season, and will received a lesser point penalty in 2020-21 if they approach insolvency.

Ajax canceled Abdelhak Nouri’s contract, though the club and Nouri’s family remain in conversations about a new arrangement.

David Squires is inspired by The English Game and finishes out the Premier League season in his latest cartoon.

Today’s longer read: Macaela MacKenzie interviews Alex Morgan on preparing for the birth of her daughter amid a pandemic, and expectations for life juggling motherhood and her career with a postponed Olympic Games in the cover story of Glamour’s April issue