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Greetings, astral traveler. It is I, Troy Parrott. You may know me as an Irish youth international, or as a Tottenham Hotspur player that Jose Mourinho will not play. Why? It is in the stars, it is not for me to say.
But what many of you do not know is that I have other talents — I am an accomplished reader of fortunes, a skill passed down to me through generations in my family via my great-grandmother, herself a notable seer. It was she who first saw my potential as an oracle, if not a striker.
It is true! I am, in fact, a diviner of mysteries, a sagacious medium who peers into the realms of the beyond, known throughout the Ireland U18 squad as He Who Sticks His D—k In the Face of the Future. Armed with my custom deck of tarot cards, join me as we take a journey into the depths of augury and forecast. In this series we shall examine all 22 cards of this special deck’s major arcana, looking at the various permutations of each in a reading.
But be warned, gentle reader! These cards can provide insight, but they can also deceive. They do not tell the future, but guide the reader onto potential paths. There is no good, or bad. There is only how one interprets the readings.
Let us get started, shall we? We commence, as they say, at the beginning of all things.
The Fool
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Upright
Beginnings, spontaneity, innocence, naïveté, free spirit
Inverted
Recklessness, wisdom (but often too late), foolishness, risk-taking
Ahhh, the Fool. He carries the number 0, which represents both unlimited potential but also the loss of everything. It is round, like an open mouth. The Fool perches on the edge of a cliff, representing both the beginning of a journey and also a cataclysmic fall to his death. Contrary to his name, the Fool is not an idiot — he is youth personified, full of boundless promise and energy. The future stretches out before him like an ankle ligament.
Upright, the Fool represents the best of youth — he looks both up to the sky and out to the horizon. What lies out there — the title? a Champions League final? Real Madrid? The dog (Brady, it is assumed) is a faithful companion on the journey that is to come. On his back is a pack containing his Golden Boot trophies and dreams of high-value contracts. But the Fool does not trifle himself with matters of the here and now. See that? On the edge of viewing? I believe that’s Alan Shearer, and just beyond — Ah yes. Greavsie.
But inverted? The journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step... off a sheer cliff. Upside down, the Fool reverts to impetuousness. Look at the mountains to his back — they are the reckless challenge, the injury, the start of rehab and the promise of a return to glory. Inverted, the Fool still represents a new beginning, but perhaps not the beginning you wanted or even planned for. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it could require an adjustment, like settling for 20 goals in a season instead of 30, or preparing for a new career in a different sport. Perhaps it signifies kicking oblong balls in Boston instead of round ones in London. Perhaps it’s the acknowledgement and understanding that you have fallen from the precipice all the way to Tier 2.
Foolishness is not folly, at least not always. The Fool is a card that represents change, and transition. Who knows in what form that change will come? At least the Fool is prepared, as are you, gentle reader who drew this card.
Come back tomorrow and we shall discuss the next card in the Tottenham Hotspur Tarot.