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The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Friday, July 17

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Gallon man

Newcastle United v Tottenham Hotspur - Premier League Photo by Ian Horrocks/ Getty Images

Hello, all!

Yesterday was a big day for Gareth Bale — he won La Liga with Real Madrid on his birthday, so might as well share a classic picture of him.

Ramble of the Day

A number of weeks ago, my sisters and I were talking about, of all things, units of measurement related to a gallon. There was a pretty handy way our teachers taught us when we were in elementary school, but they jazzed it up a bit by the time I got to school:

(Dustin Deweerd/YouTube)

It is easily one of the silliest things I’ve ever learned in school. The Big G, as it’s known, is actually a helpful way to remember how many cups are in a pint and I don’t question it for a second. It’s the adding of arms and legs to create Gallon Man, which is how I learned it, that I question. I doubt giving the Big G a body made it more teachable, but I wonder if Gallon Man came with any stories. If he does, I wonder if they were any good; a quick Google search indicates the modern iteration of Gallon Man is a robot, which may lend itself better to creating stories. There have been some great films about robots, after all; Ex Machina and WALL-E spring to mind.

I am struggling to think of good origin stories for Gallon Man, robot or otherwise. I can’t help but think about MAWA Man and the Virus Vanguard, and very few superheroes compare that group, honestly. (But wouldn’t it be fun to believe Gallon Man could be as interesting as Ex Machina’s Ava, or even better, a unique mascot at a Championship club?)

tl;dr: I learned about units of measurement from a character called Gallon Man, and I doubt he has an interesting origin story.

Stay informed, read this: Will Hobson on the stories of 15 women who are accusing high-ranking employees of the Washington, D.C. NFL team of sexual harassment and verbal abuse for The Washington Post

Links of the Day

The USL match between San Antonio and Rio Grand Valley was postponed after someone at RGV tested positive for COVID-19.

Chelsea’s Beth England and Emma Hayes won Barclays player and manager of the season honors, respectively, for the 2019-20 season.

A longer read: Tom Marshall on the tensions that flared during the early days of of the MLS is Back tournament for ESPN