The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur news and links for Monday, April 5

Hi, all!

There may be one of those “the manager might be a problem” playlists coming tomorrow, but if it doesn’t, it’s likely I’ll have one by the end of the season.

Ramble of the Day

It’s the first Monday of the month, so we’re in for another round of the Premier League Expectation-Embarrassment Index, a measurement in which teams are and aren’t embarrassing themselves and an exploration in recency bias. As always, a refresher on the rubric is here.

1. Manchester City, 46 points (no change)
2. Leicester City, 36 points (+2 places)
3. Manchester United, 34 points (+3 places)
4. Southampton, 34 points (+12 places)
5. Chelsea, 33 points (-3 places)
6. West Ham, 33 points (-1 place)
7. Liverpool, 31 points (+13 places)
8. Leeds United, 31 points (-1 place)
9. Crystal Palace, 30 points (+2 places)
10. Arsenal, 30 points (-7 places)
11. Everton, 30 points (+2 places)
12. West Bromwich Albion, 29 points (+5 places)
13. Brighton & Hove Albion, 29 points (+6 places)
14. Burnley, 27 points (no change)
15. Aston Villa, 27 points (-5 places)
16. Wolverhampton Wanderers, 24 points (-7 places)
17. Tottenham Hotspur, 20 points (-5 places)
18. Fulham, 19 points (-10 places)
19. Sheffield United, 18 points (-1 place)
20. Newcastle United, 17 points (-5 places)

It probably comes as no surprise that the relegation contenders always end up towards the bottom, and a few teams had some really bad form — Fulham and Sheffield won only once in their last five, and Newcastle didn’t win any. Form wasn’t quite the reason Tottenham plunged to the bottom. The team did the exact thing the Expectation-Embarrassment index punishes — they embarrassed themselves with that elimination from the Europa League. I doubt any other Premier League team enjoyed a more embarrassing moment in its last five games.

In other things worth noting, Liverpool had the greatest jump from last time and might be writing the end of their embarrassing streak. Additionally, no one can really reach Manchester City, but I can’t imagine that comes as a shock.

tl;dr: Some teams embarrass, others don’t. The bad news is that the team we like is one of the embarrassing ones.

Stay informed, watch this: actor Daniel Kaluuya talks being Black and British in his opening monologue on Saturday Night Live

Links of the Day

PSG’s Marco Verratti tested positive for COVID-19.

The entire Valencia team walked off the pitch after Mouctar Diakhaby was racially abused by a Cádiz player.

Juventus suspended Weston McKennie, Paulo Dybala and Arthur for one match after breaking COVID-19 protocol.

A longer read: Suzanne Wrack interviews Arsenal’s Lydia Williams on being an indigenous athlete for the Guardian