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Arsenal 3-1 Tottenham: Community Player Ratings

Do something that makes you happy today.

Arsenal v Tottenham Hotspur - Premier League
The one good thing that happened today.
Photo by Clive Rose/Getty Images

That was awful. Tottenham Hotspur went to the Emirates for the first North London Derby of the season and played the worst football they’ve played all season. Spurs were down 3-0 by halftime, and although they clawed a goal back thanks to Son Heung-Min it wasn’t nearly enough. Arsenal kicked their butts up one side of the pitch and down the other and rolled to a 3-1 win that was even more comfortable than the scoreline indicates.

Time to rate the players. I’m going to post the poll and you’re free to rate them if you want. However, if your intent is just to shitpost half-star ratings for everyone, let me propose an alternative.

I was on Twitter duty for this match and for the last 20 minutes instead of actually paying a ton of attention to the match I spent the time asking our followers to tweet photos of their pets under the tag #COYSpets. It certainly made me happier. So if you’re just going to doompost, I propose instead you skip this one and post a photo of your pet, or your kid, or something that makes you happy. I guarantee that the ratings are going to be universally bad no matter what, so instead let’s add a little joy to each others’ lives.

Rate the players from 1⁄2 to 5 stars. Or don’t! Post your pets instead! If the player doesn’t deserve a rating due to minutes played, DO NOT RANK. I will round the stars up/down to the nearest half-star for the player ratings later this week. Or maybe I won’t, maybe I’ll just post cat photos instead. Who knows!

If you’re on mobile or found this via AMP and the survey isn’t appearing below, here’s a direct link.