The Hoddle of Coffee: Tottenham Hotspur News and Links for Tuesday, January 4

Hi, everyone!

I realize I have opinions on the smell of different hand sanitizers. I won’t bore you with them, but it’s not something I ever thought I’d have.

Ramble of the Day

There has been a serious amount of Son Heung-min content lately. Maybe it’s because the saga of the Harry Kane transfer that didn’t happen allowed Tottenham PR people to truly put him front and center, or maybe it’s because Son’s particularly willing to do fun things in front of a camera. Maybe it’s both. Maybe it’s something else. Maybe it doesn’t matter because it makes decent Hoddle content.

Son joined a growing list of footballers to appear on Fake News with Amelia Dimoldenberg, Pro:Direct Soccer’s true or false show with Premier League players. Son does a solid amount of banter throughout this video, which provides a very different vibe from the series of Tom Holland videos Spurs posted throughout December.

My thoughts, in bulletpoints:

• Did Son say his military service was not that hard?
• What is a “normal” muffin (and why aren’t blueberry and chocolate chip muffins normal)?
• I will say that I think Son’s comment about Dimoldenberg looking like she’s eaten a lot of muffins is a step too far for me. I’m not really here for comments or jokes about people’s weight.
• Son’s fake story about the muffins is pretty funny. I love that he pretends it was his mother’s idea, and that he pretends Dimoldenberg offended his mother by calling the muffins dry. (Dimoldenberg does a good job at not offending his mom, blaming the dryness on the preservation method.)
• Now he’s saying doing kick ups for four hours (as a child) wasn’t that hard! I’m less surprised by this assessment, but I remain impressed by his stamina and skill.
• I find it very funny how preposterous Son thinks some of Dimoldenberg’s questions are. We all know she’s joking about taking cats to training, but there’s something earnest in Son’s response: “Training? Excuse me?”
• We never get an answer to this, but I think the last statement is true. I can totally envision players taking advantage of a large training ground by playing some hide and seek in their downtime, and I can totally envision Son being the best at it.

tl;dr: Son Heung-min was on an episode of Fake News with Amelia Dimoldenberg and won’t tell us what a “normal” muffin is.

Stay informed, read this: Amanda Loudin on the first all-Black team planning to climb Mount Everest for The Washington Post

Links of the Day

94 people tested positive for COVID-19 in the Premier League’s latest round of testing.

Angels Group CEO Lewis Taylor is in talks to take over FA Women’s Championship side Coventry United after owners opted to enter voluntary liquidation last month.

Augsburg signed Ricardo Pepi from FC Dallas.

DJ Fer Palacio received death threats on social media after being accused of infecting PSG’s Lionel Messi with COVID-19.

A longer read: Nick Ames profiles the Guardian’s footballer of the year Denmark’s Simon Kjær on saving Christian Eriksen’s life at the Euros